Dh been made redundant twice in last 17 months.
First time he was given quite a lot of money (about a years salary) and he found work within a month or so.
This new job was only part time (we had the redundancy money and a baby on the way - I as 8 months pregnant). He has worked 3 or 4 days a week (alternated it) for a year, which was wonderful for both of us with DD.
Poor DH was made redundant again over Xmas. No money this time.
I have just returned to work after 13 months off. I have been back 3 weeks. I am part time, 3 days a week.
DD was all set to go to nursery but we cant afford it (or we can but we dare not pay out in case we need to rely on this money for our mortgage if DH can not find work)
So DH is having DD 3 days a week and looking for work in her 2 to 3 hour lunch nap (which is about enough for him to be honest) and then looking for work on Thursdays/Fridays.
He is really trying.
However, I am finding it hard (as I suspected) that he is with DD for 3 days.
I am finding it hard to "let go" and I call him twice a day so see how they are getting on and asking Q's like "has she now had her mid afternoon bread stick", so far he has not told me to f off!
More worryingly (I think) I feel resentful towards him. I think that I am somehow annoyed that he is not working?
I know thats selfish of me as its hardly his choice. I just feel that I/we really want another baby and that this whole job "mess" is ruining things. I dont want to get pregnant without knowing that we have some security.
I know lots of people are out of work, and I know he is trying (not as hard as I would like but still really trying) but I just feel that my life has been knocked off kilter (spl?) and feel resentful.
He does not know this as I feel its unreasonable of me and instead I am nice and supportive, but I think he probably knows .... ???
We are both a bit stressed but at the same time I know that we are lucky compared to lots of people (to have that redundancy money).