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Asking men out

2 replies

outofpractice · 07/04/2003 17:27

I have not had a boyfriend since previous relationship ended. Finally, I feel that I am sorted out, ds is happy, asks why I have not got a boyfriend, I am doing well, and actually I really would like a boyfriend again, with a view to a serious relationship. I have also thought a lot about what I can accept and can't accept, and what I am looking for. However, I am totally out of practice and can't make a move. I used to be good at attracting attention but can't remember how to do it. I never asked men out, because it used to scare them off, but I used to be good at getting men to go out with me in a friendly way, out of which something would develop. Life has changed so much, perhaps because everyone is so busy at work at this age. Nothing seems to be happening. I want to see more of someone who flirts with me, because I need to know more about him and his character before I decide whether I really fancy him. What should I do? I feel very inhibited. I am also anxious in case this person has got a girlfriend, though I know is not married and does not live with anyone. I feel very insecure because I am nearly 30, ie that men will feel afraid that I am too serious in my intentions. Logically I know that I still look attractive, but I am feeling paralysed by insecurity because I have just not been involved with a man for so long. I also feel scared that I have forgotten how to be a girlfriend, having got used to doing everything myself. Please tell me what face-saving ways there are to ask men out. What worked for you?

OP posts:

EmmaTMG · 07/04/2003 17:42

If he's flirting with you then he must be interested in you and wanting to know more. If I was you when you next talk to him (whilst he is flirting) ask him if he has a girlfriend. This will surely give him a message that you are interested in getting to know more about him and maybe he'll ask you out, saving you the job.
Good luck.


zebra · 07/04/2003 20:29

I was thinking yesterday about this cringing episode in my life when I was besotted with a fellow who was flattered enough to let me hang around, but totally disinterested, otherwise. I'm sure you'll get there with patience, Outofpractice, but boy am I glad to be out of the dating game....

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