I dread having sex with him!!!!!!

[volcano]

I've been with my dp for 10 years. I still love him hugely, and we get on very well. But I dread having sex with him. I suppose to be totally frank the sex bit has never been the best bit of our relationship. It was fine before the kids, but no more than that. But since the kids, it's been terrible. He is sensitive in bed but
quite shy. I am so exhausted from the kids/house/work that I rarely want to initiate.
There is a physical twist to this in that
he is quite small, and since the kids, I can't really feel him any more. I can feel our sex life dwindling away, and I'm only 30!

volcano..you say it was fine before you had the kids, but no more than that..do you mean not hugely passionate just enjoyable...question is do you still fancy each other...

well... do as many kegel exercises as you can and get DP to use his fingers more often.

it might be more enjoyable than the actual penetrative sex IYSWIM.

On the other hand, maybe it's not the same for him anymore either if he can't feel you.

great! so I've managed to kill one more thread!

I have taken pity on you Branster. I can identfy with what you are saying Volcano because it was the same for me after having chidren. Pelvic floor exercises make alot of difference and you could try pilates classes. If all else fails there are surgical remedies. But we need more information volcano. Are you tired, stressed or depressed. Do you really love him and what do you mean by him being quite shy? But cheer up I am sure there is a remedy.

tangomum I am forever grateful to you!!!
I seem to kill most threads I go on of lately