Hi Liffey
I am still making plans to leave. I have been to see another solicitor, the first one I saw has now gone on maternity leave so I had another free half hour with her colleague. Actually it was 1.5 hours as I think he felt sorry for me!!
He has a very "can do" approach whereas the first one was quite negative. He agreed I cannot possibly continue to live with H once I have told him I want to leave as he will threaten suicide, make a huge drama and involve the children which could be psychologically damaging for them. H only thinks of H and certainly would never put DC's needs first.
So now I need to find a property to rent, view it and sign a tenancy agreement. Smuggle furniture and stuff in over the next few weeks and do a moonlight flit. Without H finding out! It frightens the life out of me. Another obstacle is that the estate agent with most properties on his books knows H so that rules a lot of the houses out because of the risk of H finding out in advance.
Emotionally I am doing quite well. I am 100% sure now that he is abusive and I am not insane or have control freak tendencies as he had formerly convinced me!
I'd love to hear from anyone else who has left their P or H in similar circumstances and any practical tips they can give.
And most importantly how Puffle is doing and whether her DP is still turning on the charm. That's the hardest part in my view.
Thanks Liffey for your concern! Please reply Puffle if you can.