I have a brother who has estranged himself from the immidiate family (me & my family, and mum and dad. After being very close throughout our teenage yrs and early adulthood things took a funny turn when he met his wife (10yrs his senior and previoulsy married). She was alright at first but it quickly became apparant that she clashed with my mum, its probably mroe complicated than this but I feel the clash came from my mum trying to 'mother' her like she would do anyone, and my brother's wife taking this the wrong way as though she was in some way being undermind. Anyway there's never been a big fight or anything like that but as the years have gone on my brother's wife has made what should be 'normal' family get to gether's very awkward and confusing. things came to a head last yr and she feels that my parents haev 'never accepted' her. I dont know where the evidence for this is and I have usually been with my parents when visiting them as they live a long distance away so we tended to visit together - so I would have seen any negativity towards her. She has now decided that none of us are welcome in their home (they have two young kids too) despite them always having been welcome in our homes. I've tried the 'softly softly' approach and even called but had the phone put down on me by my own brother who knows I'm pregnant. This has hit us all really hard, especially as they have a daughter I've never been allowed to meet and a five yr old. I feel like an only child and am pregnant myself- the pressure is suffacating at times because my parents only have me and my family now.
The pain of it all eases with time but its always there, I dont know how I will feel once my first baby is born as it will be so sad that my brother and his family dont want anything to do with us at such a special time.