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Original poster

TRUE OR FALSE.... "the more someone goes on about how much they are in love"..

29 replies

PigInAPoke · 09/01/2009 10:57

...the more likely that something will go wrong.
I mean those irritating couples who say " oh he is so perfect" etc and tilt their head and DONT SHARE when you say about your h's transgressions.

OP posts:
TheCrackFox · 09/01/2009 11:01

YANBU, I always think they are trying to convince themselves. They also tend to have massively expensive weddings and then announce their divorce 6 months later.

Original poster
PigInAPoke · 09/01/2009 11:02

OR you find out that one of them had an affair years before.

OP posts:
daftpunk · 09/01/2009 11:03

yeah, i agree....the 2 "perfect marriages" i've know both ended in divorce......i don't think you should be hi-lighting their problems all the time either, that can be just as bad.

Original poster
PigInAPoke · 09/01/2009 11:04

And you are stunned when it all goes pear shaped and you find out she wore an immersion suit in bed and they never touched each other.

OP posts:
RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion · 09/01/2009 11:04

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Original poster
PigInAPoke · 09/01/2009 11:06

Or women who say "oh he has a great arse"
No he doesnt. He is a middle aged man.
That alone would make a friend persona non grata.

OP posts:
Original poster
PigInAPoke · 09/01/2009 11:07

GOD DO YOU? DO you boretell other people. WHY would you feel the need to do that?

OP posts:
RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion · 09/01/2009 11:08

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Original poster
PigInAPoke · 09/01/2009 11:08
Grin
OP posts:
AMumInScotland · 09/01/2009 11:15

I have a sort of amnesty for people in new relationships - of course you think he is wonderful for the first few months, else you wouldn't get together in the first place. But yes, in a stable established relationship those who feel compelled to keep saying/showing how wonderful everything is are often the ones who are whistling against the dark

dinny · 09/01/2009 11:16

hmmm, tend to agree with OP

same as people who go on about how great their sex lives are

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion · 09/01/2009 11:18

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daftpunk · 09/01/2009 11:23

oh yeah, so is mine

mumblechum · 09/01/2009 11:23

I don't go on about how fab things are (though they are v good most of the time), but I don't really criticise dh behind his back in the same way that I don't talk about any of my friends nastily behind their backs.

You shouldn't be nastier about your dh than yuo are about your friends imo.

wannaBe · 09/01/2009 11:37

hmm torn on this one.

I think the people that constantly need to confirm to the world how desparately in love they are are often insecure in their relationships. It is possible to have a strong relationship without having to constantly need to tell the world about it.

However...

I really dislike this need to slag off one's dh and this expectation that others should do the same. I wouldn't like it if he was slagging me off to his friends (and he doesn't afaik) so I think he deserves the same from me.

AMumInScotland · 09/01/2009 11:40

Yeah, I also wouldn't slag off DH either in rl or on here, and I would expect him not to slag off my faults either. It can be uncomfortable if a friend starts going on about how useless/annoying/etc her DP is, and feeling I'm somehow expected to join in with similar comments about my DH. I'd probably just make a fairly neutral comment about relationships having their ups and downs, which probably wouldn't count as "sharing"!

TheCrackFox · 09/01/2009 11:45

Have to say don't like hearing about people slagging off their partners either. TBH I would like to go back to the 1950s where no one discussed their private lives.

daftpunk · 09/01/2009 11:49

i agree thecrackfox, your private life should be exactly that....private!

have a bit of decorum i say...plus people really arn't interested.

aseriouslyblondemoment · 09/01/2009 11:50

i have a friend who constantly runs down her dh
it's got to the point where i almost dread a night out with her
but on the flip side i also do so hate those nauseatingly loved up posh'n'becks types too

Lauriefairycake · 09/01/2009 11:53

also what Reality said - both had crap relationships with others before and we are blissfully happy.

We actually grow more in love as the years have gone by. I didn't really want to get married on my wedding day but I did it because I knew it would make him feel more secure.

We do consider ourselves very lucky.

And if I moan to friends about him (I don't remember ever doing this) I would never say anything I wouldn't say to him.

HelenBurns · 09/01/2009 11:56

I do worry, personally, about men who make a big thing of doing things for their partner as though she is a very delicate princess and can't survive without special treatment. But I am probably wrong. I guess some men are just genuinely very devoted.

Fimbo · 09/01/2009 11:56

My bf married her boyfriend when she was 31 and had been with him since she was 17. He was besotted by her and threatened to kill himself if she ever left him. 6 months into the marriage he went off with someone else..... and yes they had the big massive wedding complete with meringue dress.

Original poster
PigInAPoke · 09/01/2009 13:36

I dont mean going on and on but a bit of soliadrity when you are saying " oh he said he would be back at 4 and it was 5" rather than NO comment and a head tilt.

OP posts:
beansontoast · 09/01/2009 14:00

i think i know what you mean...

my friend and i talk about people who 'big up' their relationship..and although it sounds very nice and affirming and all that ,somehow it doesnt ring true/sounds like some kind of positive thinking technique or somesuch.

some of the funniest ever converstions i have ever had have been about slating our beloved partners and their ways

(not that that protects me from things going pearshaped!)

CatMandu · 09/01/2009 14:02

I totally disagree, I'm in a very happy marriage and I find it beyond annoying how many women moan about their dh's. Why marry them if they're so bad. What's wrong with being happy ffs.