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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Any advice on matters of the heart...long message..sorry

26 replies

LouAllisa · 07/01/2009 16:34

Hi. I'm a new member who often reads mumsnet but this is the first time I've posted. I'm a bit technically-challenged. I wondered if anyone would be kind enough to share their thoughts on this situation. I'm 38 and, while I've always dreamed of being a mum, I haven't managed it, mainly because I've either been single, commitment-phobic or with men who didn't want children. Now, I find myself becoming slightly desperate and I hate myself for it. I feel as if I have maybe two years left and it is my very last chance. An ex contacted me recently and is very keen to try again. We split up the first time (around five years ago) because I felt I didn't love him. However, in retrospect, I think I was incapable of loving anyone at that time. I was very selfish and insecure. I think I have changed a lot. I had some therapy to look at my own commitment issues and I've been single for the last two to three years. I know that in love, and in life generally, there are no guarantees, but I'm so scared about this situation. The guy is a great guy, but I don't know if my feelings for him are as strong as they should be. I would really appreciate any advice anyone might have. Many thanks.

OP posts:
lessonlearned · 10/01/2009 20:52

NKF, I'm with you 100%. No contest, but only by putting it to him will OP find out how he feels about being a committed father and if so they need that conversation about whether they will live together or not.

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