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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Has Anyone Ended Up Back In a Relatonship With There Childhood Sweetheart Later In Life??

20 replies

canthisworknow · 14/12/2008 17:48

can it work?????

OP posts:
DasherDancerPrancerFMVixen · 14/12/2008 17:52

my best friend (in her late 40s) just moved in with a man she first dated when she was 14. They seem blissfully happy. Their mothers are thrilled

My sister (in her 50s) met a guy she went out with when she was 17 five years ago and they married a year later. They are blissfuly happy....

canthisworknow · 14/12/2008 17:57

how lovely... had they lost touch or were they still in touch through the years...

OP posts:
crazyloon1 · 14/12/2008 17:59

Well, it's a lovely thought...

I got in touch with my first boyfriend a couple of years ago, he came to visit at Christmas, he kissed me

I was carried away, really wanted to give it another go

But he told me he had just used me and was in love with someone else.

I was quite angry about that. I swing between thinking 'they don't make them like they used to' about him, and thinking he is actually a right tosser

and now he won't even speak to me...

DasherDancerPrancerFMVixen · 14/12/2008 18:00

no, both had lost touch...
Friends reunited has a lot to answer for

TheBrayingBanshee · 14/12/2008 18:01

No but then I married my childhood sweetheart and still hanging in there.

TheBrayingBanshee · 14/12/2008 18:02

I didn't mean no to can itwork? I meant no to anyone married childhood sweetie later on.

Bink · 14/12/2008 18:28

Not childhood "sweetheart" but childhood grate frend and co-conspirator of mischief - knew each other all through up to university (always just as mates), then spent a proper growing-up decade out of touch, met again when I asked him to my 30th.

Advantages: (i) families are friends; we all get along & always have (ii) I remember girlfriends of dh's that appear to have slipped his memory = no surprises, no baggage (iii) no doubts about what he's really like, as qualities consistent throughout (good things: loyalty, friendliness, brains, go-getter nature; less good: megalomania) (iv) as he's always known me, presumably he has the same sense of my qualities so has made an eyes-open choice & actually really likes me

Disadvantages: there was a bit of weirdy competition over the grandchildren at first. Imagine having a granddaughter who takes after, not your family, but your own best friend - which is effectively what they each had to deal with. Surreal & a bit disorienting. However, this has been lived through & all is fine.

youidiot · 14/12/2008 18:33

I can't believe the title and the timing!

canitwork are you boy or girl?

canthisworknow · 14/12/2008 18:51

youidiot- i dont understand?

OP posts:
youidiot · 14/12/2008 18:53

I have had an email from my first boyfriend and it has caused all sorts of away with the fairies thinking. Was just checking you are not him!

canthisworknow · 14/12/2008 19:05

no i am most def not

are you single?

OP posts:
youidiot · 14/12/2008 19:07

no

canthisworknow · 14/12/2008 19:10

that makes it very tricky then

OP posts:
canthisworknow · 15/12/2008 11:42

anyone else??

OP posts:
samsonara · 15/12/2008 11:51

I wouldn't consider it but do know two couples who did this. One couple got back together after 10 years but the woman is quite successful and the man is even more so but wanted someone to look after him not do as well as him! so they split up after 2 years. The other couple also got back together after almost 20 years and are happy only regretting they hadn't decided to do this earlier as both want children but feel too old.

TheButterflyEffect · 15/12/2008 12:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

MistyGee · 15/12/2008 12:10

I dated one guy when i was 14 and he was 16, got it together 10 years later. Didn't work either time! Does seem romantic, but i think sometimes that makes you see things through rose tinted glasses. Some things are just better left alone!

MistyGee · 15/12/2008 12:12

Having said that, there was a great guy that i have been friends with since childhood but we never went there. Source of occasional daydreaming, but i reckon everyone does a bit of that sometimes.

Monkeyblue · 15/12/2008 12:14

Got with Dh at 13 to 16.
Split up we went off did different things

I married someone else got divorced got back with Dh a year after that

Been married 10 years and have 2 dc

snowleopard · 15/12/2008 12:16

I was with my first love from 16-17 (split up because he went off to university) and then again from 23-27. Didn't work out. Like samsonara's example, he really wanted a little wifey and didn't like it when I was in danger of earning as much as him - he ended up having an affair and that was that.

I do think the second time round, when it started I still had rosy teenage visions of how much I was in love with him, and it took a long time for me to work out that he was actually a twat and however much I thoguht I was "in lurrve" with him, I didn't actually like him.

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