What is wrong with the woman next door? :-(

[MrsSnape]

I know I should probably be thinking less about this but it really worries/confuses me.

Remember I posted a couple of months back about the woman next door (who I thought was being beaten by her husband) being rushed into hospital? they thought she was going to die, mix of bulemia and type 1 diabetes?

Well she's only recently come home. When my kids are outside playing they sometims go across to speak to her and she said to them "your mum is very pretty isn't she? she's lovely, very slim..." ??? (of course, DS replied "not really!" but when she see's me she acts really odd, as if she's scared of me or something. This morning I saw her in the front garden so I said a quick "hi" and she practically dropped her bag, stood looking at me and then murmered "hi" really quietly as if she expected me to attack her or something!

Before she went into hospital she used to constantly go on about how nice my hair was and how slim I was (I'm not!) etc... I don't want to sound like I'm being big headed but I hope to god she didn't start starving herself because of that...I know it wouldn't have been the sole factor but even if it contributed I'd be mortified.

I have spoken to her husband a few times but only in passing, I've never gone out of my way to speak to him or anything, have I upset her somehow?

She's so lovely, very timid, shy, placid ... vunerable seeming, I feel a bit upset that she seems frightened of me since she came out of hospital.

Didn't want to leave your post unanswered, MrsSnape.

Feel for your neighbour, who doesn't seem to be having a happy, balanced time of it.

Can you invite her over for a cuppa and a chat and try to get to know her a bit? You know, break down the mystique and become more "human" to her, where she has you on a pedestal? You might also gain a clearer insight into her situation and then be better placed to support her.

Not full of ideas on how to handle this TBH, but HTH a bit.

cuppa brew

I've only read to OP

but my ititial thought is

That she knows you must know that her dh beats her and is embarrassed and worried you might say something and then she won't know what to say in return.

Her bulemia is not related to you, she will use every woman she sees as a measure to how this she isn't iykwim

oh look there were onyl 2 posts.. I coulda read them.. I thought there was hundreds (for some reason)

how rude of me

this = fat

bloody drugs

so sorry

I'm going to sound heartless I know, but i would advise you to take care and not become too involved. She sounds as if she has a lot of problems and while you can be a good neighbour, ask if she is OK, look out for her etc., if she really starts to lean on you, well, she's right next door and it could become difficult to cope with. They sound like problems you couldn't fix, so don't feel responsible - especially not about how your boy might have made someone else feel - that's not your problem. I think best to be nice, smiley and supportive but not get sucked in.

boy! body I meant

I agree with snowleopard - I remember your previous threads on this woman and she is someone with serious problems. You are not a trained social worker/mental health professional and while it does no harm to be polite and friendly in passing, you could find yourself enmeshed in a situation that is way beyond you.