Do you think a relationship can ever work if there has been so many problems but you are willing to work on it?

[cantpickyourfamily]

Exp and I are not together at the moment, I do not know why but I feel like I am drawn back to him all the time and I really do not think we should be together. I am going to list all the reason why I think we should not be together:

There is a chance he could have cheated on me seceral times but he is willing to pay for a lie dectector test to prove he has never been unfaithful.

He has been violent a few times during our 5year relationship, but says it is due to the medication he takes for his illness. But he would go to councilling so we can both learn to communicate better as a couple.

He has alot of issues with my family so they do not always get on which causes problems between us.

Do you think with these problems we could ever be happy? We are in our early twenties and have been together for 5years. I just feel there is always this connection between us so it makes it difficult to end the relationship and not go back.

I can not explain it really but there is something like a spark or something that keeps pulling me back in.

If he did this lie dector test and it proved he has never cheated and then we had councilling do you think we could make it work?

Please be honest but not harsh as I am feeling really torn and upset. We speak on the phone constantly even tho we are not together and I feel so confused.

lel1 - he sounds horrible, as I'm sure my exp must sound to you. The only difference between them is my exp has always said he wants us to get married. And he has always wanted us to live together, we have lived together on and off for 5years and I am always the one that leaves him or asks him to leave as I feel the relationship is not right for me.

have you got dc's together?

No we don't have children together, I already had children when we met. In some ways him not pushing for committment suited me at the time as I didn't want someone getting involved with my kids and taking over, we were happy as we were, and my family has always been really helpful with them, which helped. I think he prob felt a bit pushed out at first, there was a battle between him and my kids in some ways as they didn't like him and were jealous of him getting my attention I think, he could have made more of an effort, and he did at first with them, but when he didn't get the reaction he wanted or got a bad one, he ended up a bit resentful prob. But they did end up getting along and now he has a lot of affection for them. Not that they can meet anymore since they know whats he been up to, they are older now and have left home.

see that is another problem I have, I am worried about meeting someone new as I have dd and do not feel it would be right to meet a new man and move him in with me.

I would not want him to be a father to my dd, so that makes me feel as tho we would never be fully commited, seems like I could end up in a similar situation to you.

Was your dc's father still around when you met?