I'm so pissed of with lazy arsed DP

[memoo]

I went to bed early last night (half 6) because was ans still am feeling ill.

Got up this morning and house is just a mess. Hasn't even washed up supper dishes, kids clothes are juat in a pile on the landing and the living room was full of dirty cups.

I'm so pissed off becuase this is just typical of his attitude. If I don't do it it doesn't get done. I have talked about it with him many times and he swears that he will help out more but nothing changes.

I'm sat here crying now because its starting to wear me down. I am one person and can't be held responsible for doing everythin but some how i am. the laundry basket is over flowing because i haven't done much the last few days. He won't touch it but he'll be winging in the morning if he has no clean clothes.

God, reading this thread makes me glad I live on my own!

Memoo you have my sympathy, XP was very like this and I was expected to do cooking/cleaning etc even while ill as he simply didn't see it as 'his job'. And if he did 'have' to do it hemade sure to let me know what inconvenience it was. It's so disheartening to get up to that kind of mess, isn't it?

Have you tried spelling out what needs to be done - is it a case of he simply doesn't get it or that he thinks he shouldn't have to do it.

I think the former is easier to deal with than the latter.

Hope you're feeling a little better.

Pheebe in this case BOTH parents work. The OP works almost full time. So staying home and doing the housework cannot be seen as her "job".

In this particular case the problem is that this man left his sick wife to get up to a pigsty house rather than clean it up to help her.

I agree with you that housework isn't demeaning. It's one of the ways that we show love and care for our families. Failing to do your bit, particularly when your partner is ill and needs extra support, is a failure to love well.

memoo - he may well not see what needs to be done, or he might not agree, or he might (my speciality) see what needs to be done and put it on his "to do" list but never quite get around to it. I am married to a very efficient man and I do have to make an effort to pull my weight or else he just gets everything done while I'm staring into space and thinking deep thoughts

"To him a kitchen full of dirty dishes isn't really a problem"

Let's face it, a kitchen full of dirty dishes is never a problem to a person who has no intention of doing them.