so is this how it's meant to be then?

[SpandexIsMyEnemy]

(sorry another gloating one - but well after 8 years with an abusive arse, it's nice to be pampered!) & wasn't sure if all nice blokes are like this or if I've just found a gem??

so after the fantastic sex thread last week, beau & I decided to go to the GU clinic together (just to make sure - I had to anyhow I digress) anyhow, sent the boy to mums for the night, left beau in my house for about half an hour.....

came home to find....

yellow post it notes all over the house with little messages on them, like I love you, princess etc....
a bottle of my fave wine and 2 glasses chilling in the fridge...
I opened the door to the bedroom, & found, it all lit by candles, (varying size)....
fresh rose petals around the floor & on the bed...
some new lingerie laying on the top of the bed, (in the right size as well!)

it's the first time anyone's gone to so much effort for me - XH certainly wouldn't have! we had a lovely night! lol.

How lovely

[post-it envy]

what a lovely man

[mean emoticon]

alas thumb witch - I did make a joke that the reason i've not spoilt him in the same way is because I like to set the bar low so I can build up to it - now he has no where to go, (5 years of marriage has taught me it's not rosy! lol) but he swears blind he'll stay the same.

Spandex - good idea to set him the challenge though! Keep him on his toes etc.. well done you!

yeah but my betting is a year or 6 months even n it will stop! lol.

as long as the fantastic sex doesn't the rest i don't mind!

Blimey, how lovely, lucky you

if after all the crap i've had IB I can meet a nice chap - theres deffo a nice one out there for you as well.

Am resisting the urge to post a negative reply to that Spandex LOL.

• lucky you. make sure the bar is kept at this level from now on!

I think it's good to hear of a really nice dp - my dh is great - and 13 years ago we used to do all of this stuff - especially with the post it notes!
I would say it is possible for it to last - although it's not at the same high level all the time he does do good birthday treats and sometimes just suprises me with something for no reason.
I think it's a shame that there are so many awful blokes out there (you just have to scroll down the thread list for examples) that it is worth reminding ourselves and celebrating that there are some gems!).

dp - hmm not sure i'd go that far! lol. has only been a few months but as beau's go - he's by far the best i've had!

it's good the magic as it were can last, do you have DC's as well? is there any secret to it all?

as I say (and for those of you who know my story) my X was a total bastard. for 8 years he was abusive, controlling, manipulative, we had times it was fantastic and times it was so bad. Pretty much all other relationships have been volatile as well.

(is made better by the fact my folks seem to love him n think he's fantastic!)

We just have ds (7 months) we met when I was 17 and he was 21 as a holiday romance and we've now been together for 13 years...
I don't think there is any secret to it - other than genuinely loving each other and being honest - ie I'd rather be the FIRST to know if he went off me - rather than the last. I think it will make a big difference to you in your situation - having previously had a bad relationship to have met one of the genuinely nice blokes that do exist! We've found it hard having ds but the things you appreciate change - it's suprising how grateful you can be for a cup of tea while breastfeeding and how inventive you can be during the times ds is asleep
I hope it all continues to go really well for you - don't forget to suprise him with nice things from time to time!

that I think was the key thing with XH & I - aside form everything else was the whole not enough time as a couple thing. (we were both 17 as well when we met)

but that aside... anyhow.... how to spoil the man back then (that doesn't involve cooking... hmmm....) - any thoughts? lol.

mmmm, maybe open the door in your undies? (obv make sure it is him and not jehovahs - but this will probably prevent them from keeping you there for an hour chatting, or maybe not, they may wish to discuss things more 'in depth')

go for a picnic with all his fav foods?

leave a nice note in his wallet telling him you are thinking about him?

tickets for a concert/comedian he likes?

send him something - card/rose/balloon - understand this may be a little soppy.

hmm, still got post its - and some stockings as well... lol. (he's intrigued as he's been instructed to knock the door instead of letting himself in the back while I settle DS asleep in the front!)

lets just hope DS doesn't wake up with the door knocking, or indeed that he goes to bed early!