Did you feel guilty when your marriage broke up?

[Pinkjenny]

Dh and I are having a horrendous time of it. I'm genuinely not sure we're going to survive this 'blip'.

But I feel so guilty towards dd that I can't think clearly about whether our marriage is capable of saving.

Maybe I should have namechanged for this.

I didn't feel guilt with regards to me and h, more like relief.

The hardest part was telling the children and I did feel guilty that something I was doing made them upset. My ds (13) cried for a few days but I made sure we talked a lot.

But because I was honest and open, they seem to have coped and adapted really well.

I emphasised that it wasn't their fault and that me and their dad still loved them loads. They understood that if me and their dad were happier apart, that meant we got on better. They know they can see/stop with their dad whenever they like and he sees them more or less every other day. H and I do get on better now than we have done for years. Things are easier as there is no relationship there anymore.

H also took a few months to find a place to move out and ds said he was glad that his dad didn't just disappear overnight. DS also saw that we were very amicable during that period and still are. Fortunately.

My dd (then 5) said that we were still a family, just a different type of one!