I can't manage penetrative sex after six months

[Sixmonthmum]

Hi everyone,
I love my husband to bits and before baby came along 6 months ago we were making love at least 3 times a week, often much more. But now I seize up down there and he can't enter me more than an inch. Obviously my libido is a lot lower than it was but I still have some desire. This isn't happening to any of my friends in similar situations. I had an emergency c-section, postnatal depression and I'm still breastfeeding. Has anyone had this and what will help it to go away? Please?

Sorry if this is TMI for this time of day but........

6monthmum - try having sessions where you BOTH play around but agree NOT to touch any genitals, forbidden!!

When it gets too frustrating, stop then next time agree to touch everywhere & help relieve each other but no penetration( apart from maybe a vibrator or DH's hand)

When you are happy with manual penetration, proceeed to anything you like

Lots of lube & wine at all times!

Good luck.

I don't agree about CS meaning no scaring, it's my scar that stops us.

Tinker - What I meant was, obviously, that OP wouldn't have any scars in her ladybits due to tearing/episiotomy/nasty stitches which could explain why her DH "can't enter more than an inch".

I sympathise with your c-section scar and that its pain might make sex difficult, but I don't think that is OP's problem.

But I can sympathise with what she was saying though, sometimes it does feel like that. It doesn't sound like it should be right.

My GP was helpful and referred me to the gynae unit right away. Agree with whoever said that you should get physically checked over before assuming that it's a psychological issue. Just because you didn't have a vaginal birth doesn't necessarily mean that all is well down there!

H U R R A H ! ! ! !

We made it. We got merry on wine last night earlyish in bed and, we weren't planning on going the whole way as we weren't expecting to be able to, but we wound up trying, and it happened, my husband was able to enter me. Thank goodness, at last.

We think what helped was the wine, the lubrication, AND the fact that we were both more relaxed as the day before we had had a day trip out to a beautiful wildlife nature reserve beach ON OUR OWN, without baby (who was packed off with bottles to Grandparents for the afternoon). This was my first day with my husband just the two of us, since before baby was born 6 months ago.

If anyone else is having any difficulties, I would recommend trying for a day out just the two of you.

xxx

Hi sisxmonth mum,

I simply could not have proper sex while breastfeeding, somehow my while body was devoted to my baby : I was a mum not a woman any longer; This fell slowly back into place once I stopped breastfeeding (not that I am saying that it is a bad thing to do so!), Don't stress about it, to be a mum is such a change that you need to give yourself some time to fall back into who you were. There is nothing abnormal about the way you feel.