hubby jut left

[csi]

My husband a few yer ago had an affair. i forgave and we got back together. It was tought going and he since has texted women his met on the job.His a builder. but he says they were purely friendship etc. And he swore he wouldn't do it again.

So things have been going along. He had my name tattooed on his arm a couple of weeks ago and we just celebrated our wedding anniversary.

I found out today that his been texting another woman again. Off the estate his been fitting bathrooms on. He said its innocent she said its innocent. But i dont care if its innocent he shouldnt have been sodding texting her. Its been early morning late night when his been home with me and the kids. And he even texted her 3 times on our anniversary when i was getting ready.

I feel so numb right now. He has taken a change of clothes. but i know he has no one to go stay with unless the guy from work lets him crash at his place.

One friend thinks im stupid for chucking my marriage away over texting. As i asked him to leave. but i dont think im wrong. Fair enough i cant think straight.

It took everything to forgive him last time. My heart wass so crushed. And now he does it again. I dont think i will ever forgive him this time and im pretty sure this marriage cannot go on. I will never trust him. Id be worrying everytime he left the house constantly checking his phone and thats no way to live.

But now i have to put my best smily face on when im dealing with the kids.

I honestly dont know what way to turn. I love him but i know it has to be over.

Morning,

No i didnt sleep well at all. And no again to any contact from dh. But i know his game and thats to give me the silent treatment in the hope that i will crack and text or call him.

But i wont. I have nothing to say to him. Im still very angry and still of the opinion that this marriage is finished with.

How about you. How are you doing? Have you and your dh spoken?

hi csi, yes dh and I have spoken, he said nothing has happened and he has been silly to resume contact of any sort.

The other texts where from girls of men he knows but they are very forward.

I will never know exactly the truth. However, I can see that he is distraught i am going to plod along and see what happens.

I have told him in no uncertain terms do I expect him ever to engage in text of the nature again otherwise the marriage will be over.

How are you coping?

Not to good. Im still on the end of the silent treatment and im not giving in to it.

Im just fuming at his arrogance. He did wrong but its me that gets ignored. Makes it easier for me to tell myself its over this time. Im not going to be treated like this. I pulled him out of the gutter when no one not even his family cared and this is my repayment!

There has been no apology of any sort and that is bothering me. I have left allhis clothes etc where they are as if i bag them up they will just be in my way.
But this is no sort of life and i deserve better. Simply as that.

hi csi, how are things for you tonight. Has your dh broke the silent treatment? Are coping with the kids ok under the circumstances?

Hope you are ok and not too stressed and upset!

Try and get an early night and lots of rest tonight if you can.

Cannot be easy with five children

Have heard from him and his now cut my mobile phone off!!

So im beyond fuming now!

He wants nasty i can do that.

He said i have taken his kids away from him???

The last time i texted i asked him if he wanted them next saturday.

I just dont know anything anymore.

why has he cut your mobile off? Has he done it because he thinks you have taken the kids away from him therefore splitting the family? It is ludicrous if he thinks this way.

csi, this is awful that it has come to this. Try and calm down a little look at the bigger picture and try to assess what you want from life and whether that includes dh as your husband.

I know you are mad and upset, rightly so. But, please kick back, look at the bigger picture to you can go forward positively in which ever way you want.

I have known lovely women turn really bitter in situations like this and they have really hurt themselves in the process.

If you decide you really dont want to be married to him try and do it with a calm head and you will also cope better.

Let me know how things are going.

Yes he did say on the phone when we spoke briefly that i had taken his kids away from him! Which is ridiculous. He has done all this not me.

Well his done himself over because now he can only contact me via the home phone and as soon as i hear his voice i will be putting the phone down.

I have a new sim for a different phone on another network coming and i will not be giving him that number.

My future is definately without him. The man is a complete spineless idiot.

The house is mine i have my own car and my own money so im all sorted there.

He is not who i want as a husband he is completely spiteful and im no longer interested.

If he thinks this latest trick will have me begging him back his made a huge mistake because its had the complete opposite effect.

I will go food shopping today as i have barely done anything in the past couple of days but mope. But no more. Its a new day and a new start my kids need me.

He can play all the dirty tricks he wants i will keep my dignity in all of this.

I managed to dress myself and kids today and dragged us all off shopping. Now im back got 1 dc asleep and 2 fighting and 2 gone to gp's for a week.

and i feel like collapsing in a heap.

Think its finally hitting me.

I love him so much despite all the shite his put me through.

But which ever way i look at it i cannot see away through to making our marriage work. I know i'll never trust him and to me that will cause endless problems.

I want to keep things civil between us. But for now im so angry. Angry that his been flippant enough to go back on his promise to me and his caused all this pain and anger.

Not to mention what it will do to the kids when they realises daddy will not be living with us anymore.

I have no one to turn to as all im getting rom them is saty strong and dont let him back.

who is saying stay strong and dont have him back?

Believe you me, until it first happened to me I always said I would walk. But, in the hard light of day things are normally alot more complicated that.

Take time to really think things through. Could counselling be an option for you both.

Sometimes discussing things with people dosent help as they often dont have the same values and ideals as yourself. Luckily for me, one of my closest friends does and she understands where I am coming from.

In all of my desperation I have not even told my mum what has been happening the past few years.

I didnt even tell mil as I knew she would be upset, dh told her in the end. She also phoned me today to see how I was, so I told her, she is speechless yet again.

Like I said take time. If you have something that you think you have worth rebuilding, is it worth one last shot?

Let me know how you are and give yourself a little tlc. I have three kids and know how hard and stressful it can be, never mind five. How old are they?

Now the tears have started!

Its friday night his got his wages and his off out!

A couple of so called friends and my mum but she did say in the end it was my decision.

People around here are not really interested in your life unless it can benefit them. I really hate where i live. No one is real they are all so fake.

His at his brothers who is so heavy into drugs and shagging anything that walks and guess who dh will be out with all weekend.

My stomach is in knots and i didnt think i would feel like this i was so angry.

My 3 dc's i have with me alone for the week are 2,4 and 6 and my 6 yr old is sn as his deaf and behavioural. My mum lives 80 miles away and i have no one to call to come round! I cant go to my mums as she has my aunt and her gd staying for the week so i wouldnt really be welcome and my mum is not the hearts and flowers type. she is more hard case and get on with it.

So right now i feel as lonely as you can get.

I think not having my mobile is a good thing as i cant then sit and text him.

I just keep thinking will he even think of me tonight or will i be the last thing on his mind. I honestly feel like im the only one hurting out of the 2 of us while he gets to do what he likes.

hi csi, how has your weekend been?

Have you spoke to dh anymore or do you still feel the same way about him, that you do not want him back?

I hope the weekend has not been too stressful for you. Let me know how you are.