Am I abnormal? My husband thinks so

[vannah]

Just after some quick opions here.(sorry this may seem trivial in comparison to whats happening on the boards here, but really upset to be called abnormal)
We are arguing over the fact that I am 'abnormal' because I am not really into beach holidays by the sea. Three reasons for this:

1. as a child my parents took me around everywhere each summer, we did a lot of sightseeing, and virtually no sitting around on a beach. So Im not familiar with it. Im also asian and not keen on sunbathing/tanning as my husband is.
2. My husband has a lovely habit of eyeing up anything remotely pretty and I dont feel very good about sitting on a beach with a person who makes me feel bad.

1. My youngest is 7 months old and my toddler is nearly 3, I dont like the idea of exposing them to a hot sunny beach all day.

Therefore, am I abnormal?
I should add that this comes after I refused to join my husband's sister and mother on a beach holiday - not the nicest of inlaws. The three of them are quite heated up over my refusing a beach holiday using the very genuine excuse that we are saving up this year.

thanks in advance for your opions...

Crap. You are not abnormal and your husband sounds like a bully.

Not abnormal at all I don't like beach holidays we always save for a few years then do a big holiday like florida or to dp's family in new york much better than going to places like spain every year imo

I love beach holidays. I love having a sand pit in the garden so that I can pretend that I am at the beach, and I don't really mind the children getting sand in the house because it is as though we were on holiday.

I do however accept that the vast majority of the world's population would think that this is completely abnormal.

I think that beach holidays are great for 3 year olds, but 7 month olds just eat loads of sand and the sun is a problem.

It is normal for your partner to take your wishes into account when choosing a holiday destination. It is very sensible to think twice before going on holiday with the inlaws.

I loathe and detest beach holidays and would rather walk up mountains...

They are fine if the kids are old enough not to eat sand, run away, drown themselves etc etc.

Stick to your guns and say you just don't enjoy them...there are about 10,000 other holidays you can have.

Suggest a safari followed by a trek across the Kalahari, lots of sand and sun there

not at all, I love the beach, live right by it, but even I wouldn't want a beach holiday where I spent all week laying out sun bathing.

DS enjoys going down to the beach - but we go maybe once a week for about 2/3 hours of an afternoon, and to be fair he's still got his shorts/t shirt on.

all honesty thou i'd not take a 7mo to the beach for a holiday the 3 yo yes - if I knew for sure we'd spend one day pottering around the pool/beach and the rest out and about. but deffo not if it was literally a week on a beach.

Thinking it's reasonable to take a 7 month old and a 3 year old to a beach for a holiday is abnormal IMO. Far too much exposure to the sun.

you sound more like you are making excuses to not go on holiday with your inlaws or to a place where your husband might come into contact with or look at other women.

Not abnormal at all.

More worrying is the fact that your husband makes you feel so bad about yourself, and the fact that YOU had to spell out that you can't go as you're saving up. Surely the saving is a joint decision? In which case he should have been well aware that a holiday was never on the cards anyway??

You're definitely not abnormal. But I think you and dh should probably make some time to do some serious talking about these things.

The fact that you don't like your inlaws is a bit irrelevant really.

I love beach holidays. So do 100s of 1000s of others.

But that is completely irrelevant to how you feel. You are just as entitled to dislike beaches, as much as your DH is entitled to like them. You're different to each other, that is all, and you are definitely not "abnormal", which is a horrid, hurtful thing to say.

However, as previous posters have said, it really wouldn't matter where you were if your DH makes it obvious that he is eyeing up other women ... though I accept that there is usually more for someone like that to look at on a beach.

I love beach holidays but I understand they are not everypnes cup of tea, my husband is sooooo pasty that we find a holiday where i can sun worship and there is stuff for him to do.....would def not go on holiday with my iLs for love or money!!!!!! You sound as normal as they come!!

Maybe you could compromise and go somewhere that has interesting things to do as well as beaches (like Spain...)
Your dh can take the 3 year old to the beach in the morning while the baby naps and you read or whatever, then in the afternoon do something else together.
I like the beach but could never spend the entire day!

many thanks again everyone and very reassuring to read all of the replies. Miggsie I would rather mountains any day too, I love switzerland ...but again, not really suitable for babies either.