Wanting a mother's perspective

[Frederich]

I am writing for advice on my girlfriend and her children.

I have a real problem with the noise, they all (my girlfriend too) scream and shout constantly. Like today she told the youngest to do something, he said "don't you want me?" and she screamed at the top of her voice and said "course I do" and they all burst out laughing etc. I'm not a killjoy but I really don't see the point in all the screaming.

A few weeks ago we were playing this game which is like a time bomb thing that you pass around each player and if it blows up in your hands the thing pops out the end and hits you in the face. Everytime the bomb landed on any of them they started screetching and screaming like they were so excited it was going to explode but after a while it became really ott as if the screaming was the fun, not the actual game. Then they started flinging it towards each other in panic before girlfriend whacked it so hard it flew off the board completely and ended up in the middle of the floor. Que shit loads of screaming and squealing before the kids stood up and started kicking it around the room in panic. (It eventually exploded in the dogs face which caused loads more shouting and screaming).

I know they're only having fun but I've never known anything like it, they can't just have a normal board game, they end up going crazy. If they watch a DVD they end up going mad half way through and chucking stuff at each other or screaming the phrases from the film.

I have limited experience with children, my own upbringing was not chaotic like this and I'm finding it really hard to accept as normal. I told her it bothers me and she said that's the way her family is and they would not change. My sister is not like this with her kids and the friend I spoke to who has kids said he wouldn't put up with so much daftness either.

Am I being unreasonable here or is this really as unusual as it seems to me?

Thanks

I don't direct at beadiness at an op merely because it's a man. It's because it's a load of shit. This op is clearly being a bit of a rubbish boyfriend. Quite frankly of he doesn't like his gf's children (or the way they carry on, at least) then that's a relationship in trouble.

However he gives no details of how long they've been together, whether they live together etc. One assumes from his post they have no children together, why post on a parenting forum? If he is childless and dislikes being around his gf's children he clearly doesn't consider himself a "parent" even by proxy, so what's he doing on a parenting website? Despite his title I don't think he's looking for "a mother's perspective".

I know what you mean. I go on Rollercoaster and the ONLY board I can NOT face is the single parent board, the one board that might probably help me, far too depressing. Loads of men and women fighting. NO flirting at all. Total hostility.
Internet dating. Would rather skewer out own eyes. You'd be better off standing in the middle of tesco and trhowing a stone and seeing who it hit.

TheInsider, I can understand the dilemma though. It seems real to me... or potentially real.

I used to hate children before I had them thoguh! If I walked into a restaurant and there were children there, I'd be huffing and puffing and just waiting for them to annoy me. And sometimes when I'm chatting to my 'mumfriends' and there are between the two of us 5 children interrupting us..... it can be a form of torture.

retiredgoth the more the merrier. You may have a y-chromosome but as a parent you have the same ishoos many of us "mums"netters have and that's the point.

It's not about gender, it's about situation.

Which is an entirely seperate point from the one which is that I have very little sympathy for Fredrich. Post away Fred, you'll always get an honest opinion

I don't disagree LLGE, not trying to have a ruck. I just couldn't summon up much sympathy for Frederich's post. He's not been back much thoug,h so maybe he's not interested in insight into his problems either.

THe Insider, me neither, not locking horns! Maybe I'm too naive. Yesterday I seemed to be the last one to cop on that Cotsta was actually 'Andy' who has posted before always with a different screen name and slightly different melodrama. If somebody's going to invent different personalities and different screen names.. it's not joining in it's taking the piss a bit.

.....not the hairy eyeball!

I feel suitably chastened...

Was that "Costa" (or whatever his name was) thread a dud then? I read a little of it and did not suss.

....I hadn't realised that I was a naive soul....

WEll I wouldn't have known either, but apparently his style (of typing?) was familiar.... Or maybe it was parts of his story.

I've no idea, but posting style is weirdly similar. Anyway am moving on now and will try my best not to be sucked into any thread by male ops in the next 24 hours (rg excepted of course ).

Maybe next time he will have a daughter and his x will have gone to Tasmania!