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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

He's done it agin, I don't know what to do.

17 replies

RockHardPlace · 10/07/2008 11:31

Had a big thing with DH over weed smoking, it was a complete betrayal.

I warned him not to hurt me again.

This was only a few weeks ago.

Now I have really bad SPD, I am on crutches at 16 weeks and am in agony.

He has had to leave work to help me look after kids.

Which means until december we have had to make a benefits claim.

I am struggling on the money I get as i used to get alot more into my bank but now only get about half, ive been worried about shopping ect ..

I just went on his email (not snooping i use it too occasionally and was waiting for amn ebay messgae)

and he has spent £167 on some stupid remote conbtrol race cars

Im sick of hoim doing stuff like this

big argument started I lost my rag and he just started calling me a lazy bitch, i cnat cope with my lkids ect ...

all the things that his mum had said to me a few weeks back that broke my heart

i feel like just hurting myself.

I feel like an idiot, he says im an idiot, that im not right and i need help.

maybe he is right

OP posts:
JessJess3908 · 10/07/2008 11:39

I think i vaguely remember your last post...

£167 on remote control race cars when you're on benefits 'til december? what a stupid c*nt.

You don't sound like a a lazy bitch... you sound like you're struggling to look after your kid's cos you've got spd plus one one big fat irresponsible stoner baby.

Please don't hurt yourself - go bash a pillow at the wall x

RockHardPlace · 10/07/2008 11:40

He doesn't smoke anymore, thats one thing at least.

I feel like everyone thinks Im a nutter and a failure

OP posts:
itati · 10/07/2008 11:42

Cancel the car order.

Take no more crap from his mother or him.

Do not hurt yourself.

He is a pillock, sorry.

RockHardPlace · 10/07/2008 11:44

He has already paid through paypal

and he would go mad.

OP posts:
itati · 10/07/2008 11:45

I think you can still cancel it.

Let him. He needs to grow up.

Give him beans on toast for his tea and tell him that is all you can afford as you touck into your meat and veg.

RockHardPlace · 10/07/2008 11:49

He REALLY doesn't see the problem

We owe my mum £150 and she has been waiting weeks

OP posts:
itati · 10/07/2008 11:51

Tell him he has to explain to your mum why you can't pay her back.

herbietea · 10/07/2008 11:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

RockHardPlace · 10/07/2008 11:59

I really feel like my life is just falling apart around me.

I don't even think I would be here if it weren't for my kids

and then people keep saying i cant cope with them and im a shit mum!

OP posts:
Divastrop · 10/07/2008 12:01

is there anybody else who can help you with the kids,do you have any family or friends nearby who could get together and organise some help for you?

yes,you need help,but only of the practical kind while you try to cope with severe pain.he,on the other hand,is a selfish immature twat who needs to grow up.

the last thing you need is having to be reliant on him and his family.be honest-do you love him?do you think the two of you have a good futre together?cos if the answers are no then maybe you should start making plans to get rid of him.

RockHardPlace · 10/07/2008 12:02

I do love him thats why it hurts so so much

OP posts:
Divastrop · 10/07/2008 12:04

'people' keep saying you are a shit mum?no,from the sound of it your dh is saying that,and his opinion doesnt count as we all know he's a tosser.and his mum from the sounds of it has made him that way by telling him the sun shines out of his bumhole so her opinion doesnt kcount either.

RockHardPlace · 10/07/2008 12:04

he said after he only said it because he know how much it devestates me

OP posts:
RockHardPlace · 10/07/2008 12:15

I think Im gonna have to say goodbye to him, everythings been great for a few weeks, but in a lifetime of marriage a few weeks of good isn't much is it?

Things like this will always keep happening.

OP posts:
waffletrees · 10/07/2008 13:23

Resell the stupid car thing on ebay. You never know, you might get more than you paid for it!

itati · 10/07/2008 13:31

I really do not want to say anything negative but it hurts to think you are woth someone who makes you feel so bad.

You are not a shit mum. He is a crap partner if he puts you down so much.

You need to work out what it is you want and need and then tell him. If he isn't willing to step up and be the man you deserve, he needs to think about whether he is prepared to watch you walk away.

Take care. So for you.

Can your mum help?

itati · 10/07/2008 13:31

with someone...

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