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Relationships

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Would you pursue a relationship with someone living 90 minutes away?

29 replies

TheCleverGreySheep · 13/08/2026 20:18

Hi there,

how far would you travel for a good connection with someone realistically ?

I met someone that lives in 1 hr 40 mins from me.
train ride - 1hr 30. We have a great connection

neither of us have children yet- and neither of us would re locate I don’t think either.
would you go for it ? Or walk away…

OP posts:
grinandslothit · 15/08/2026 04:38

As long as it doesn't end up with you going to him most of the time

Volpini · 15/08/2026 05:53

isleofskyes · 14/08/2026 16:09

Yes.

Reader, I married him.

Two hours away with London in the middle (pre M25)
We each did the trip at weekends for 3 years.
I'd set off straight from work at 5pm and drive back on a Sunday or sometimes even a Monday morning, setting off at 6am.
I moved to be with him. That was 40 years ago.

I don't consider 90 min especially long these days.
It depends on the route and if it's mainly motorways and A road.

If neither of you wants to move, then that's an issue.

Why would you not consider moving and to a halfway point?
You could still keep your friendships going and possibly work. 45 mins to work is normal.

we’ve been seeing each other every other weekend, it’s new though…. Maybe only 2 months.

So you've seen him approx 4 times ( every other weekend for 8 weeks.)
How do you feel about him?

Edited

Yes, we lived opposite ends of London diagonally. He also had a gig economy job when he was effectively working when I was off. We managed to see each other once a week at a stretch, often every other weekend. We did that for 4 years before he changed his work and we moved in together. I put up with a lot that I dare say others wouldn’t have and maybe I wouldn’t now. But we just celebrated 30 years together. (We married 11 years in and have 2 kids.)

landmarkyear · 15/08/2026 06:12

Just see how it develops. Meeting someone who you have good connection with is really special. As they say - where there’s a will, there’s a way. You’ll find a way to make this work if you’re both committed to it.

BCBird · 15/08/2026 07:22

I have gad a relationship like this. It suited us both. I would have preferred to be able to see each other occasionally in the week, (not practical- would have meant a 2h journey to work if I'd stayed over) so the odd weekend could be free to meet friends. I looked on each time I went to him, every other weekend as a mini holiday.

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