Male (late 50s) perspective here, in case it’s useful.
I went on just one site (Hinge), put some effort into my profile by using varied and recent photos with thoughtful quotes, and had quite a few first dates, then one second date … and then a third, and a fourth, etc (all with the same woman) … I count myself lucky because the one woman to whom I felt strongly attracted, fancied me back! It’s still a very new relationship, but with lots of green flags, and we spend a lot of time together without getting sick of each other … hopefully it will last, but even if it doesn’t, I would say that my low expectations of dating sites have already been exceeded.
Having swiped through quite a few women’s profiles between late 40s and late 50s, I do also have a few suggestions for your profile that might help you to get better quality matches, in case you have the patience to read a wordy post. My only agenda here is if I can help one woman get a few better dates and avoid some crappy experiences with badly behaved men, then my time writing this will have been well spent.
-start with one site. You will probably get enough matches to keep you busy, especially if you put a decent effort into your profile.
-use recent photos that look like you, are taken in good lighting, and in which you look happy.
-include at least one photo that shows your body shape (so basically not just your head, and not wearing a bulky winter coat), but don’t feel any requirement to show lots of flesh or even be dressing “sexy.” Any sort of normal summer clothing would show enough, I should think. Gym / bikini pics / form fitting evening gown with plunging neckline = nice, sure, but not necessary unless that is your personal style.
-include photos and quotes that show your interests and lifestyle in a range of settings, so that men who are compatible and want to share more than a bed with you can picture themselves doing that. One of the key photos that caught my eye with my new flame involved hiking boots and shorts because I’m rather outdoorsy.
-you don’t need to lie about your age. I hesitated before putting my true age, and met someone else who did exactly the same. Trust is important to both of us, and that helped us get off to a good start.
-unless you have a reason to want to avoid meeting people who live close to you, start with a tight geographic filter. Travelling far to meet a semi-random new person is a real slog. Conversely, ending up with someone who lives fairly close by makes it a lot easier to develop a new relationship. You can always expand that filter later if you don’t like the matches you’re getting.
-for a first “date”, choose some sort of activity you will both enjoy whether or not there is chemistry. That way you will not have wasted your time even if it is not “your person,” and it will be less of a slog to meet multiple people.
Thinking about some of the profiles I said “no thanks” to right away … five headshots in random different settings don’t tell a guy anything about you. Also don’t be wearing sunglasses in every photo. Eyes and expression are really important. And include mostly quotes that convey who you are, rather than what you want from a guy. Let them show what they wish to offer you.
I have been pleasantly surprised, after having heard so many negative stories about these sites, because all but one of the women I met in person looked like their photos, and all of them seemed like lovely human beings, even if only one of them felt “right” for something more. But maybe the average “quality” of the guys on these sites is lower. I just don’t know because I don’t date guys.
Oh and all the suggestions you and others have made about safety make total sense (message on the site initially, do a call or even video call before meeting in person, make initial meetings in a public place with lots of different exits, delay any sort of home date until you feel 100% happy with that, etc). I should hope that any decent guy with a modicum of awareness will understand why, and will at least go along with any and all of these safety measures, and perhaps even suggest some of them himself!
I hope this is a little bit useful and wish you best of luck and hopefully a bit of fun as well!