Partner has thousands of stranger females on his facebook friends. Is it normal to want him to delete them?

[jenny29394i]

My partner who I recently discovered is 100% a narcisist has thousands of very attractive females as friends on his Facebook. He added them when he was single before me. Iv only been with him 9 months so far. I said to him I have complete respect for women you know and I'd never ask you to delete women you know or hold you back from your female friends. He said I was crazy and paranoid and have a serious problem and should trust him. But trust in my opinion grows from feeling prioritised and cared about and I dont feel that. Not anymore anyway. So honestly...am I wrong? Please be honest as I really dont know anymore

Sounds like you should delete your partner. Permanently.

If you think he's a narcissist why are you still with him? Just dump him, then you won't need to worry about his FB.

Yes, you're 100% wrong. You're wrong about not dumping this guy immediately. Why are your standards so low that you think a man who, as per your own words, is a narcissist and collects women's accounts on social media is a man for you? Can you not do better?

Is this you Rachel?

If he’s 100% a narc why not leave him instead of fiddling around on FB?

You know what type of man he is OP. You can't change that.
You either accept what he is like and put up with it and let it affect your self esteem or you leave the relationship.

Thankyou I just needed to hear that I was not being overly paranoid. I only figured out his was a narc 3 days ago. I appricate every reply. Never dealt with a narc before. I will cut ties with him. Just hurts that I thought I was finally happy but at least I learnt something from it I guess

If he's '100% a narcisist' why the fuck are you wasting your time on him at all?

Raise your bar.

Please say you aren’t hanging in there with the idea that you might be the one woman who will be enough for him. If he is a true narcissist, that will never happen.

Leave him with his FB collection and go and find a man who is worthy of you.

I couldn’t care less about who my partner has on FB but if you have reached the point of amateur diagnosis of a major personality disorder in your partner, probably time to split.

What are you wittering on about - 100% narcissist?

if you truly believe that you shouldn’t be with him. End. Of.

He sounds sleazy! Get rid.

My partner who I recently discovered is 100% a narcisist

At which point you immediately left him and never looked back, right?

Right?

I don't know how you only figured out a few days ago and have now labelled him 100% a narc but at 9 months in he is not your partner he is a fleeting boyfriend and if you do suspect he even has narc traits you run and block and pretend you never met him.

Well I knew something wasnt right but I didnt know what it was. Then I google it and its exactly him to a t. He never says sorry, he doesnt take responsibility. Everything is my fault. He has this obsession with being rich and gorgeous. He said he isnt very empathetic which is true. He says he is different and special. He doesnt listen when I talk. He puts me down as a joke. I thought it was just him. I bought a book on narcs but theres just no doubt. His personality is strongly linked to all its described. I thought it was adhd at first but he defianlty a narc. It's not as easy to just walk away once you love someone and they gave you the world and now they have changed. I'm confused. I love this guy I genuinely care about him and he has turned into a completely different person and I have to except that I guess and move on. But it's not easy

There are dickheads everywhere and it's taken you nine months to work out that your boyfriend is one. Luckily he isn't your partner and you can call a spade a spade and walk away without a backward glance.

You don't need shitty behaviour to have a diagnosis for it to be real.

You love the guy he was pretending to be, not him.

Yeah they can keep up the act for as long as it take for you to fall in love with who you think they are, then the real guy comes out and makes you so confused because you want to dump this guy but you hope the good guy will come back. Which he will occasionally to keep you confused enough to hang on. Don’t wait till he destroys you to make you see this needs to end

This sounds like two people who shouldn’t be together. I wouldn’t be with someone who I think is a narcissist and has hundreds of attractive women on his social media, and equally I wouldn’t be with someone who goes through my social media and decides who I need to delete.

If he's a narcissist, just end the relationship instead of trying to police him.

Hopefully you don't live together so you can walk away easily. Have you had a birthday since you met him, did he ruin it. I've read on here that narcs hate it when they're not the centre of attention.

Run a mile but also before trying to diagnose an evil fucker in future please do not describe selfish self serving people as having adhd. That is NOT what adhd is.