How have you broken a trauma bond and moved on?

[Boeufsurletoit]

I've been with my avoidant partner for several years, and it feels like less of a relationship than when we started. We live separately, share almost nothing and argue all the time, so it feels like leaving shouldn't be this hard. I've had several failed attempts at moving on from the relationship, some lasting a few weeks, but I'm starting to think I'm addicted. It's hardly even a relationship, so why can't I move on? Please tell me your successful stories of life after a trauma bond!

I used ChatGPT. Literally explained my (former) relationship and asked it to help me break the trauma bonds.

I recovered more in 2 days than I had over the previous year.

Thank you. I've just had a go and it's given me some very good advice! I'd still love to hear other people's experiences though. Especially what were the hard parts and how did you get through them?

I think you need to get out of your head. Trauma bond, addicted, avoidant... try to stop pathologising what is in essence a shit relationship, and decide that you don't want to waste any more of your one short life on a dickhead.

Do other things, keep busy, get in control of your thoughts and your feelings will follow.

I did. Took me 8 yrs. I had to severe all contact. When my psych called him the ‘crazy maker’ I just remembered that every time I was tempted and knew he was dangerous for me.

weird thing is he’s not that special at all. I don’t even get why I was so obsessed.

@seanconneryseyebrow I hope things are better now. "Crazy maker" is a good phrase to remember.