Anyone else feel like they are meant to be alone?

[TwistersS]

Does anyone feel like they will never meet anyone and be alone forever? Everyone around me is getting married, having children and moving in together and im here still single, approaching 40 and feel Like I will never meet anyone now. Please tell me theres still hope!

if you are happy alone then thats fine and this post doesn't apply to you

Honestly
yes
and Im not happy about it

Thanks for commenting, was starting to think it was just me, would nice to know that there is still some hope

I'm married with kids, but many of my friends are single and feel the same.

There's hope, but you need to be intentional with what you want. The pool of good men is quite limited.

Yes, I've been single for 4 years and know for various reasons I'll never be with anyone again. It's shit but I've learned to find contentment in other things.

I’m 55 and even as a child I felt like it was my destiny to be single. I then met someone at 20 and got married but it was never a great fit for me and he was abusive. Been single for 16 years now and I’ve accepted that it’s just not on the cards for me this time around. I occasionally feel sad but for the most part I’m just relieved to be free and independent.

I am happy about it! I see so many angry and obnoxious men and look at their partners and wonder how he treats them at home if he does that in public. I see how men act when they think women aren't listening, how they get angry enough to kill spouses over sports matches gone wrong. I think how bloody lucky I am not to have to clean up and pander to one almost every single hour of the day.

Agree. The amount of happy respectful marriages I see is so few and far between it’s depressing.

I think perhaps I'm meant to be alone, which is unfortunate as I've been married for thirty years! 😃

Being happily in a relationship with someone you truly feel partners with and cherished by is one thing, but there is also the opposite. Finding yourself in a relationship which you thought would involve being cherished but where you actually feel more like you are opponents and you are too scared to leave because you know he will try and destroy you, might even try to kill you, is a different kettle of fish. I would much prefer to be on my own I can tell you.

As a minor aside, I don't mind if I never hear another male using the toilet ever again. It is really grinding my gears lately and I don't mean just the one I am married to. We stayed in a B&B recently and I was woken at 2am by the sound of a horse urinating from a great height into a bucket, in the room upstairs. When my husband uses the toilet, I can hear it all round the house, whatever room I'm in and I know there will be a few drops of urine on the floor in front of the toilet for me to step in or wipe up. Apparently, this is perfectly normal and acceptable in modern life, hence the existence of those manky furry pedestal mats that are supposed to go round the base of the toilet for soaking up piss. I have had enough of male toiletting!! I am mulling over learning how to pee standing up so that I can make as much noise and mess as possible when I do it, wherever I go!

If you can, embrace being single because it could be a lot fecking worse.

Ive had three husbands and its taken me this long to realise I cant live with a man and I need to live on my own. I have now realised. Happy days.

Yes I feel thats it for me . 6 years post divorce, not met anyone of note and can't be bothered now to be honest. Sometimes I want someone and most of the time I dont. Im at peace with it now

I love being single. It really riles me when people demand to know why I am single, and refuse to believe that I can possibly be happy on my own!

My food is where I left it, I don't have to clean up urine from the floor or loo seat, skidmarks are not left down the loo, I can starfish in bed if I want to, call me selfish but I don't have to compromise, I can go and do whatever I like (providing that it doesn't clash with work), I don't get pestered for sex when I don't want it, I don't have to be the Magic Cleaning Fairy to clear cups and crockery off the coffee tables or out of bedrooms and cars, and I don't have to endure constant whistling. I like peace and quiet!

@TheeNotoriousPIG why is it always men that whistle 🤬 I hate it so much

It took me a very long time to meet my partner. I was around 36 when we met. That was 13 years ago.

Prior to that, I had a very short lived marriage in my early 20s, and then a string of useless, lying boyfriends. Looking back I wouldn't have dated after my divorce. All they did was waste my time and lie, cheat etc. I wish I'd stayed single and focused on my career until i met the one I'm with now. I got absolutely nothing out of dating between the ages of 24 (after the divorce) and 36 (when i met my now-partner).

If you like being single please feel free to start your own thread, this is for people that are sad about it

I dont know that im destined to be alone, im not sure ive ever felt about it like that. Ill have been alone 20 years in November and I think my job so far has been to make other people's lives work.

I may be in your life a week, a month or a couple of years but what happens is that i meet people, I identify what they want and help them get to that point. Then, when they are happy im no longer needed. The process repeats itself - such is my life.

I work as a behavioural specialist specialist in a primary school ( mainly angry and autistic kids) and it is lonely as there arent many men, at school everyone assumes that im gay, which im not.

Am I destined to be alone ? Who knows but I have long since stopped worrying about that. I focus day by day being the example my children need to see. There are good days ans bad days.

personally i dont want kids, dont have the maternal need so to speak, as for a partner personally i prefer no strings attached, as keeps it simple, especially after reading the various relationship threads on here and my previous experience

Plenty of married people are desperately lonely too. Getting married and having kids doesn’t always mean the end of loneliness.

Thats sad but different

Thats ok if you are not someone that gets feelings easily, I don’t think it’s simple for a lot of women though

true, i think the other thing that puts me off its yes they are cute at first but then its the trantrums, the arguing, the being swines etc and even in teens they are 50/50 so overall its a long term investment

ive had causal in the past but I don’t like being a filled in till they find someone they actually want to be with, does nothing for my self esteem

Now having spent 20 years plus looking after everybody else's kids, it has giving me a deep wanting for children of my own. I've always had this idea that one day it will be my turn, but as im 50 next year it would appear thats not going to happen to me.

for me, its basically the pleasure in the moment when needs are needed taking care. plus the psychology boost from who you can pull so to speak makes it more better overall