DH and I are on the verge of splitting up after a 10 year marriage and 2 young children. The decision isn't final, but it's hanging there. I really need advice from mums who've been there as I just don't know what to do, I guess I'm struggling with practicalities.
DH often works away Monday to Friday, so all childcare is on me. They are in bed by 7.30 so I can't go out after that, and they can be really hard work. I have a very stressful and demanding job so juggling everything is already a struggle, and I've recently been thinking of reducing my hours again.
We share finances but he earns double what I earn - we both work but I'm part time (4 days). I have minimal savings.
Realistically if we split, we won't be able to do 50/50 custody unless he leaves his job. Which means the only option would likely be him having the kids every other weekend. I think this would break me honestly. What have other people done in this situation with childcare - would the other parent have them more in holidays, or just pay more maintenance to allow for some possible help?
If we split up, What's the next step? Neither of us could move out until the house is sold. I have no idea if I could afford to live alone. Do we have to divorce to separate finances properly? Do we do it ourselves?
I just don't know if my life will be any better or easier splitting up, or if it will only make my life utterly difficult and miserable as I'll be on my knees?
Sorry for the ramble, I'm just trying to piece my thoughts together. I can't even think about the emotional side right now either :-(