Partner won't get naked for sex

[ThatFastGreyDreamer]

Hi everyone,

I'm going to cut straight to the chase. I've have been in a relationship with my gf (We're lesbians) for about 10 months and have had quite a bit of sex in that time. However, she will not get fully naked for whatever reason. I'm not sure if it's due to body confidence issues or something else. Is there anything I could maybe say to her to boost her confidence? I would love to see her butt naked which I always am when we get intimate in the bedroom. Is there anything I could maybe say to her to boost her confidence?

I don't think you're going to get much lesbian-specific support here, op, and i think that's what you need.
Have you tried an actual conversation?
Body confidence is the last thing that comes to mind as a likely reason, though.

Have you tried very low lighting, as that might help her feel less vulnerable and scrutinised?

The best thing you can do for her is accept her choice.

Just let her be.

Does it matter? Maybe her keeping specific clothes on is to deter you from venturing towards that place or maybe she just feels more comfortable that way. If you really want to be with her, accept it.

Talk to her. That’s the only way you will find out her reasons. And telling her how much you love her and fancy her might help too.

She’s the one you should be talking to… is she keeping her socks on cos it’s cold?

Without getting too graphic I am finding this a little hard to understand! If you are having sex then presumably you are accessing all relevant areas? Is she perhaps a little heavier than you and sensitive about how she might think she looks? Maybe she needs to know that you like her how she is?

Why would we know more than you? You’re also a woman…

Depending on what stays on each time it's probably body insecurity?

Maybe tell her you'd like to talk and focus in the conversation about what you've noticed, how much you'd enjoy seeing her in all her glory and that you've been wondering about how you could help make her more comfortable. Reassuring her you want her to feel good wouldn't go amiss though. Maybe she'll even be relieved you brought it up?

I'm not sure if it's due to body confidence issues or something else
Why don't you just ask?

Maybe she is a stone top. I'm a bi woman but I've met a few women in my time who were this way, or "touch-me-nots" as the community sometimes calls them.

It doesn't seem to have bothered you for 10 months. Does she need to be naked? Is it really about her confidence or your preference?

Just talk.

Yes, I have tried talking to her about it. What also doesn't help is that she admits she feels awkward being partially clothed while I am naked.

Just leave her be, surely it’s not stopping anything. She has her preference and you have yours.

We do talk, I think maybe with time she might feel comfortable going fully naked hopefully. Oh no, she always has bare feet when we get in the mood.

I had a previous girlfriend who was the same (slightly different situation, I'm male).

In her case it was very much a body confidence issue. She was overweight and absolutely hated her stomach. I tried telling her that I loved her body, that it didn't bother me, and hoped she'd get more comfortable over time.

She didn't, and I ultimately ended the relationship. Not just for that reason, but it was a part of it. At the end of the day, part of sex for me was being naked together. I wanted to feel her body against mine without her top always being in the way.