Ex dropped out of parenting app

[TitaniumTess]

Hello, coming up to 6 years now since I asked my ex to leave the family house. He was emotionally abusive.

Family court was 3 years ago. To protect me as he had been problematic at handovers and in communications, the court order states for us to use the Talking Parents parenting app to communicate.

I've always been proactive and calm and fair in the app, making sensible suggestions. That's not always been true for my ex. He's caused no end of trouble in lots of different ways. All communications are tricky with him.

I've been trying to communicate with him to send sports arrangements etc for our son, and to arrange calls during holidays etc. It states that my ex doesn't have an account now / up to date subscription.

I've asked the Headmistress at school to inform my ex. Does anyone have any other advice?

My ex has been making holiday rules up as he goes. He changes his own rules often. Then he says that I am harassing him.

I've genuinely only ever tried to do whatever makes our son's life easiest.

Thanks in advance

What did the court specify that the contact arrangements should be?

You are obliged to make DC available at those time for collection, but nothing more. You are not obliged to agree to swapping times and days to suit him - he gets the specified days and nothing else.

You can't force him to take DC or do his share.

Talking parents recently (May 31st) ended their free subscription, and you now have to pay for an account. Perhaps he just hasn't paid for the subscription. If it is in your court order send a message to him through email reminding him that all communication is meant to be through the app as per the CAO.

Yes I think it’s the subscription issue with talking parents. I haven’t paid either so if my ex is trying to message me on there I won’t get the messages either. I think we are ready to move back to text now tho.

I am very keen to stay on the app. Having it all in one place is helpful. And, not having to worry about his name popping up on email/whatsapp/text is priceless - Keeps all the nastiness contained!

@whyohwhyisitalwayswetI think the same. He was pretty nasty over WhatsApp or relentlessly trying to get me back, so having a safe space that I can read when I feel ready helps me no end.

I've got an Enhanced plan too and I could do with dropping a level.

I've contacted Talking Parents, who described how to change this on their website. However, because my subscription is through Google Play, it won't let me alter it.

Google Play only gives me the option to cancel my subscription.

If I do that, will I be able to immediately start a new subscription, and access the same notes and records again? Does anyone know?

Thanks for all of the help xxx

I checked my Talking Parents account and discovered my ex does not have an active subscription either! He hasn't moved to the paid subscription, I guess. Hopefully he will because I refuse to go back to his abusive messages on work/personal emails and over whatsapp and texts :( It is in our Child Arrangements order so I will have to pull that lever ....

@whyohwhyisitalwayswet
Sounds like we've got similar situations! Xx

Not least that we have abusive ex-es It's been five years for me, you'd think he would have calmed down by now...!

Take it as a blessing. If he’s gone incommunicado then you can’t communicate with him. Stop trying to contact him, certainly don’t bring school into it. He’s loving the concern it’s causing you - it’s another way of controlling you. Don’t give him oxygen.
Keep all records so when he decides to take you back to court yiu can show them what games he’s been playing.

I heard that if use of the app is court ordered then you can get it for free. Might be worth looking into.