A cautionary tale - please don't flame me!

[longingforaffection]

H and I been having all sorts of problems for a long time. We have 'lost touch' with each other. Foolishly I got a bit wasted the other night, signed on the Friends Reunited and got in touch with a guy I used to know. Cutting a longish story short, we met yesterday, it was clear that he still fancied and it actually scared the life out of me. Guess I was flatterd by the email/text attention but in real life it was scarey. It made realise how 'safe' I felt with h and how much I love him and want to make things work out. I am now living in dread that I will be found out, although obviously nothing happened, was a chat and coffee, but I feel guilty and would make things worse to confess to h. I feel stupid but have realised where my heart and energies should be. Sorry this is long but just needed to get this down and off my chest.

I don't think you need a flaming!!

You haven't done anything wrong!

I contacted a friend on the same site, for similar reasons. turns out the crush I had on him for nearly 20 years is FINALLY over, and having seen his photo I know I could meet up with him and not feel anything I shouldn't!

Use this to remind yourself that you are still gorgeaus to all men, and thereofre your DH should love and worship you!! If you feel good about yourself it will rub off on him too, and help re ignite the passions!

No flames here.

You made a mistake and came to your senses.

Now let it go.

Don't confess if you think it will cause trouble. If somebody saw you just say you met by chance and had a quick coffee to catch up.

End of story.

Delete your FR profile and screen texts/calls for a while in case this guy follows up. Hopefully you will have convinced him by your reaction to his "advances" that you are not interested. If you didn't then send him one message with words to this effect.

Then stay off sites like FR and FB-they are dangerous to wobbly relationships!!!

Sit down with your H and tell him how you are feeling.

Good luck.

Thank you. H has paid me no attention for so long and this guy was saying how fantastic I look etc,etc, I could so easily have been swept off my feet! I love my h and having heard from someone else that they think I look great, I want to look great for my h.

Hope your loyalty is well rewarded and you and your dh learn to appreciate each other again.

You did nothing wrong. Everything else I was gong to say has already been said by getmeoutahere, so I will echo what she said.

Sounds like you and your DH need to rekindle your relationship. I hope tis experience gives you the motivation you need to start making changes, begining with talking to your DH about how you feel.

He text me I looked fantastic when he saw me, starts off with hiya hun, ends with lots of xxx.

ignore it

He's after a quick shag. Presumably he knows you are married. Definitely ignore it.

He knows I'm married but he really isn't like that honestly, he is very sweet and thoughtful.

Yeah right, like a wolf is sweet and thoughtful

I'm pretty convinced he wouldn't try it on but anyway I wouldn't do the deed but am really enjoying the attention. Am trying so hard with h but sometimes is a real struggle as not getting much of a response.

I'm sorry, you sound unhappy.

Please make sure that if things are irredeemable with your husband, you have tried all you can before you let another man flatter you. You sound vulnerable and just in the right place for an unscrupulous bloke (or even a nice bloke) to turn your head.

All the best.