How do you walk away from someone you love?

[Teapot07]

How do you walk away from someone you love?
That’s it really.
my youngest father and I have been on and off for the past couple of years.
he moved over three hours away and we only see him for a few hours then he has to leave.
we speak during the night as he works night shifts.
he casually tells me he’s going on holiday this Friday for just over a week.
I felt blind sided. I was like what?
then I started to get upset and then he started to shout at me.
I said you can’t even give us a week but you can go away for a week?
his response was, well it’s just over a week.
im like what the hell.
he was here for the last bank holiday. When he left the next day. I called him and there was no answer. He ignored me all night. The next day I was like why are you ignoring me?
his response was, I wasn’t ignoring you. But it was exactly that.
I know he doesn’t respect me.
he gives me the bare minimum.
the only reason why I keep going back is because the sex is good.
next year I am uprooting our whole lives to move closer to him. Three hours away. He moved three hours away a couple of years ago. Just out of the blue. We see him around once a month. If we aren’t together then he sees our child every couple of months.
she always gets upset when he leaves.
I know I need to walk away for my own mental health. But how do I stay away? I always end up walking away for a couple of months. Then we are back at it. I do love him. I don’t know why but I do.
he’s no good for us.
obviously there is way more to this. But we will be here all morning.
I hardly slept last night. I know I’m not respected, I know he doesn’t feel the same way. I just need to walk away. But how?
when I move next year he will be moving in with us. He moved away to move in with his brother. And house shares with him. He was living with me before moving. Then he just up and left.
just feels like I’m making all the sacrifices when he is living like a single person with no kids.
I know it isn’t a relationship. I need to respect myself. But I just can’t seem to let him go.
I am tired and exhausted.
I don’t even know what I expect from this post really. I need to walk away and stay away. But I really struggle too.

Can you reframe it as no longer being at the neck and call of a man who doesn't respect or care for you?

You have a daughter. Imagine your daughter in the situation you find yourself in? What would you say to her? How would you support her? Now do this for yourself. Get some counselling, work on growing a back bone and through this one back. He’s no good for you.

I am sorry to be blunt but this is not love. He doesn’t love you and you don’t love yourself either.

Don’t move and don’t call him. Let him make the effort to see your child. Focus on your kids and yourself and you will meet someone better soon enough

Please don't uproot and move closer to him OP. It won't make this into the relationship you want it to be.

Beck!!

You’re asking the wrong question in your title. You should be asking ‘How do I break up with someone who is simply not interested in me or our child and doesn’t regard himself as in a relationship, and focus instead on developing an amicable co-parenting relationship’. You don’t even love him!

Please OP good sex isnt enough reason to uproot the lives of your DC.

This guy isn't interested in a relationship. He isn't interested in being a good father.
He will do what he likes when he likes.

Find your self respect and put the good of your DC first and foremost.

You realise you love your children more and he’s no good for them.

You can only walk away from someone if you’re together. You’re not in a relationship with this man, you’re just running after him. He sees himself as single.

You'll find your self respect at some point, and that is usually when you realise he has numerous sex partners and you are one of many.
You are being used.

Don’t uproot your life to follow someone who does not love you. He doesn’t prioritise you or his child in any way. You need to find your anger at his shabby treatment of you both, see him clearly for the selfish waster he is and choose yourself. Don’t waste your life pining after someone who will never change.