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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Did I cheat by hiding contact with my ex while exclusive?

1 reply

BNathan · 09/05/2026 14:11

Hi. I need advice and possible feedback on my next move. Starting February I’ve been talking to 2 girls. By March my ex girl asked that we be friends and I agreed. I started liking one of the girls I was talking to more than the other so I asked her to be exclusive and left the other but before that I had an unfortunate night that i ended up sleeping over on my ex girlfriend’s couch that night and we platonically kept chatting for a while but I never told the girl I asked to be exclusive about it and each time I refere to my ex to her I would use her real name but not her title so she doesn’t know it’s my ex. I later cut ties with my ex and deleted her contact and texts cos she over stepped boundaries and attempted a romantic act. The girl I’m exclusive with later discovered the deleted texts in my recycled bin and noticed that she was actually my ex and I had slept over her place so she went mute on me cos she said I cheated and lied to her. Should I apologize and if so did I cheat? do you think reconciliation is hopeless ?

OP posts:
Pinkissmart · 09/05/2026 14:36

You were disloyal and you showed her you are not trustworthy.
Not only did you carry on communication with an ex, you stayed at her house, lied about it, and went to great lengths to cover it all up.
And now you’re WONDERING if you should apologise?

Let this one go. Grow up a bit and don’t enter a relationship until you can behave in a trustworthy manner.

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