I'm sorry your Dad is dead

[Sadhappiness]

These were the words my husband said to me this evening when I told him I was struggling with the 2nd anniversary of my Dad's death and him not being very supportive towards me.

He then went to bed.

I feel really lost and very angry. Why doesn't my grief matter?

9 years today for me. Dad died aged 59 after a horrific set of circumstances and a botched operation. My husband hasn't said anything. My best friend will, his Dad's passing anniversary is the next day. We have a club - the dead dad club :( the people in it get it - the people who haven't lost anyone yet just don't get it at all

My husband asked me about a year after my dad died and I was crying (something on TV set me off) when I was going to be "over it"

I was in my mid 20s

I'm so sorry for your loss. My DHs Dad died 20 years ago and he still gets very emotional at times, I always give him a hug and we talk if he wants to.

So sorry for your loss OP, been 20+ years since I lost my mum and the anniversary is always hard, even as the years pass- especially when I have hard times- miss her more then 😢
You are allowed to grieve, your feelings matter and I’m sorry your DH is unsupportive; all you needed was a hug and to feel validated and that’s the very least he should do. My STBXH is the same; I’m always made to feel like I’m insane for still hurting, it’s always inconvenient when I cry, for any reason really. It got worse after his own mum died… because it was more recent than my mum somehow his pain was ‘worse’ - playing top trumps over grief FFS! One of the many reasons I’m divorcing him.
I’m very glad you posted and gave us the opportunity to comfort you, if you can, simply cut him out of this day going forwards… I don’t mean be off with him, just plan in advance what you need and want to do to remember your Dad and simply do it. Unfortunately you know you can’t rely on your DH to support you so don’t- you do you and don’t factor in DH.
sending you lots of love xx