Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Incompatible in the bedroom

24 replies

MichBarr · 27/04/2026 10:13

I've been with my partner for a little over 3 years and I'm still finding myself questioning if she is right for me. We love each other very much and have been through a hell of a lot in the last 3 years but there is one specific area of our relationship that is very problematic, the intimacy! She isn't "normal" in the hormones department, difficult to explain. But essentially it means she doesn't get frustrated or aroused particularly. She could happily live without any kind of sex life, whereas I really can't! I am used to quite a healthy sex life and I honestly need a regular "service" 😂 We have battled this over and over and she tries but she is also very inexperienced and quite honestly, without being derogatory, she is somewhat inadequate when we do try to make love. I find myself wishing I could meet someone more compatible. I don't want to hurt her but equally I don't want to regret staying with her in a few years time. Please be kind with your advice, thanks.

OP posts:
Crazyfrog44 · 27/04/2026 10:14

Do your partner a favour a fuck off out of her life.

EmmaOvary · 27/04/2026 10:22

First post nails it.

Alwaysthesameoldstory · 27/04/2026 10:22

Please do this poor woman a favour and end things with her.

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 27/04/2026 10:25

Praying that you manage to meet someone adequate. Stay strong.

onwardandupwards · 27/04/2026 10:27

Maybe your the one who's lacking in skills hence why she's not interested in 'servicing you'

FieryA · 27/04/2026 10:28

It's clear that you aren't suitable for each other but the language you are using to describe her is quite derogatory. Does it translate to your behaviour towards her in real life too? That does not really indicate 'love' in any way. It's best you go your separate ways and reflect on your own inappropriate attitudes.

Slightyamusedandsilly · 27/04/2026 10:30

@MichBarr I'll be kind.

Leave. She'd be better off without you, you judgemental fuck.

She isn't "normal"
I honestly need a regular "service"
battled
she is somewhat inadequate
I don't want to regret staying

Who the fuck do you think you are?

CatRestaurant · 27/04/2026 10:31

Wow 😂

Slightyamusedandsilly · 27/04/2026 10:32

And people wonder why there is a male loneliness epidemic.

SnowflakeSmasher86 · 27/04/2026 10:32

If you were any good in bed she’d be interested. HTH

Unclesadam · 27/04/2026 10:33

Wow 🤣 I’ll be following this thread with interest…

Clarefromwork · 27/04/2026 10:33

“and I honestly need a regular "service" 😂”

Ick

WildGarden · 27/04/2026 10:33

She's just not that into you mate.

TerracottaBowl · 27/04/2026 10:34

Clarefromwork · 27/04/2026 10:33

“and I honestly need a regular "service" 😂”

Ick

Like a boiler and about as romantic.🙄

Villanousvillans · 27/04/2026 10:34

Crazyfrog44 · 27/04/2026 10:14

Do your partner a favour a fuck off out of her life.

This with bells on.

BauhausOfEliott · 27/04/2026 10:45

I've got a very high sex drive but I wouldn't want to fuck you either. Calling your partner 'not normal' and talking about her 'servicing' you isn't a good look.

You're not compatible. Do her a favour and end the relationship.

Forthesteps · 27/04/2026 10:46

BauhausOfEliott · 27/04/2026 10:45

I've got a very high sex drive but I wouldn't want to fuck you either. Calling your partner 'not normal' and talking about her 'servicing' you isn't a good look.

You're not compatible. Do her a favour and end the relationship.

And work on your general attitude towards women.

IggyPopsPlasticTrousers · 27/04/2026 10:47

MichBarr · 27/04/2026 10:13

I've been with my partner for a little over 3 years and I'm still finding myself questioning if she is right for me. We love each other very much and have been through a hell of a lot in the last 3 years but there is one specific area of our relationship that is very problematic, the intimacy! She isn't "normal" in the hormones department, difficult to explain. But essentially it means she doesn't get frustrated or aroused particularly. She could happily live without any kind of sex life, whereas I really can't! I am used to quite a healthy sex life and I honestly need a regular "service" 😂 We have battled this over and over and she tries but she is also very inexperienced and quite honestly, without being derogatory, she is somewhat inadequate when we do try to make love. I find myself wishing I could meet someone more compatible. I don't want to hurt her but equally I don't want to regret staying with her in a few years time. Please be kind with your advice, thanks.

Oh mate.

There is so much wrong with your post, it's difficult to know where to start...

You should leave the poor lass though. Much better for her. Probably better for you too. Get yourself on tinder and you can arrange regular ' servicing ' to your heart's content.

JazzyJelly · 27/04/2026 10:52

My fanny clamped shut reading that, no wonder she doesn't want to shag you. Go back to Reddit.

Tillow4ever · 27/04/2026 11:04

And yet you asked her to marry you according to your other thread? Whilst also keeping your ex wife’s number in your phone.

Do her a favour - leave. You sound awful.

idrinkandiknowthings · 27/04/2026 13:58

Lost for words, truly. What a giant twat. You, not her!

Lugol · 27/04/2026 17:35

You're a real piece of work OP.

Why are you here bitching about your poor girlfriend rather than talking to her?

Brightbluesomething · 27/04/2026 17:42

You sound horrific. No wonder you’re not getting any. Leave, and her life will be immediately better.

FloydPink · 27/04/2026 19:58

I do think the OP language was erm... tactless to say the least. But, to be constructive, how is the whole relationship? Generally (especially 2nd time around and in 40s/50s for me) there is compromise - on all sorts from work, house, kids, money, interests and sex. Will you meet someone that does tick ALL the boxes, unlikely.

I am I guess in a similar position as I have a much higher sex drive, but most other things in the relationship is wonderful. Could I meet someone with a better matched sex drive? Probably. But would they make me smile when I think of them, would I feel total love for them... quite probably not.

When you say not normal - in what way? But you have positioned yourself like a total cockwomble and its hard to feel sympathy with that language and description of her

New posts on this thread. Refresh page