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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Wwyd Someone I know in real life has liked me on an app.

9 replies

Pippipumpkin · 26/04/2026 22:15

Just after thoughts about a slightly weird situation.
I have been online dating for ever, but in the laziest sense...I have a profile, but never swipe on anyone. A combination of a number of factors. A poor old track record, I am quite happy with my current life and don't really want to rock the boat, and ideally if I were to meet someone I want to meet in real life and it grow organically etc.
Anyway, I play a sport regularly. There are some nice guys there, but all taken, however one has recently become single, which came up in general group conversation. Anyway he has liked me on one of the apps, and I don't really know what to do. He has never shown any obvious interest in me, he is warm and engaging and there is very occasional bit of eye contact, but he seems to be like that with everyone. I think he is great; funny, interesting, we get along well, but the one thing I am a bit wary of is that I am not sure our values/lifestyles really align.
But it now feels a bit like an elephant in the room. I don't know if he realises I can see likes, maybe he just accidentally swiped. Who knows. I haven't swiped either way...he is just sitting there blocking the rest of the stack 🤦🏻‍♀️

So, I don't really know what I am asking. Would you address it in person, over text, swipe right, swipe left, ignore the whole situation. Surely if he was genuinely interested he would make his interest a bit more obvious in real life...? I like the idea of a bit of a flirtation but it could be disastrous for regular attendance at said sport if it goes badly, and whilst he is a lovely person, as mentioned previously not sure it would have legs.

All thoughts gratefully received!

OP posts:
MousseMousse · 26/04/2026 22:21

What do you have to lose?
If you don't try, you could lose out on a great relationship.

MediumHigh · 26/04/2026 22:35

https://www.weddinghatsrus.com/

beasmithwentworth · 26/04/2026 22:55

The guy who fixed my washing machine last week liked me on Hinge 2 days later. I had similar thoughts re ‘what if I say no and need him for white goods repair soon?’ 😂

For what it’s worth, I don’t know that it’s true that if he was interested in you he would let you know IRL. People don’t always feel comfortable doing that. Especially these days!

If you like him then don’t not match with him in case it goes wrong. What if it goes right? How amazing. If it goes wrong then you are both adults and anyone sane / decent would understand that not every date or dalliance ends up with people getting together. Carry on as if it never happened.

if you aren’t interested then just decline and act as if you never saw it. He will never know for sure.

good luck!

DaffodilTuesday · 26/04/2026 23:01

Why would it be disastrous at said sport if it goes badly, if you are both adult about it and behave respectfully to each other? (Yes, we went out but it didn’t work out, is all you or anyone else would need to think)
As for whether it has legs, do you know that with anyone immediately?

The main question to me seems to be do you like him sufficiently to want to go on a date with him? Or even message him in the first instance.

decorationday · 26/04/2026 23:07

"ideally if I were to meet someone I want to meet in real life and it grow organically etc."

Is that not what is happening here? It will certainly never happen if you run away in a panic at the first sign of interest lest it all goes wrong!

JMSA · Yesterday 02:00

Oh come on OP, go for it!

JMSA · Yesterday 02:01

decorationday · 26/04/2026 23:07

"ideally if I were to meet someone I want to meet in real life and it grow organically etc."

Is that not what is happening here? It will certainly never happen if you run away in a panic at the first sign of interest lest it all goes wrong!

EXACTLY

Left · Yesterday 06:54

This happened to me with someone I knew from my child’s hobby. I liked them back and messaged them and they unmatched me. A few days later they liked me again, so I messaged “hello again”, and they unmatched again 😂

I decided they must be one of those people who swipes on everyone in their stack, and then unmatches anyone they aren’t interested in. So awkward, it was a while ago and luckily it wasn’t a hobby where parents had to stay so I could avoid the other person 😬

Pippipumpkin · Yesterday 11:39

Thanks for all your replies. I am not hugely confident in the world of dating and tend to overthink too much maybe. Perhaps I should just match and make some daft comment to break the ice. As PPs have said it may not go anywhere but I don't really have anything to lose I guess.

@Left I think that is my concern, but he doesn't strike me as the type to do that...so it would be a bit embarrassing if he swiped me by accident 😂
That is weird behaviour for that guy to do it twice though. It's quite entitled. At least you could avoid him and dodged a bullet at the same time!

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