Should I inform estranged relatives about the funeral arrangements?

[Maurit]

A relative has just passed away and I’m arranging the funeral. The relative had not been contacted by his brother for many years and actively disliked his sister in law. I’m inclined not to tell this couple of his death or to invite them to his funeral, as I think that expresses the relative’s wishes. Should I do so?

Same here. I don't want my siblings to know if I get sick or die before them. When my father died, I asked my uncle to inform all the family because he's the default head of the family and gets on with everyone. My mother couldn't handle it because my siblings were abusive to her. If she goes before me, I have to organise her funeral - dreading it!