Marriage or not??

[MichBarr]

I want to get married, partner doesn't see the need for a "piece of paper". We have been together over 3 years and we are engaged but that's only because I asked her in a public place and she didn't feel she could say no. She wants to just stay as we are forever, but that's just not me. I've been married before but she hasn't. She looks at statistics and assumes we would be better off just as we are. I want her to be my wife. I don't know what to do if she doesn't feel the same

Asking in a public place so she couldn't say no is the kind of behaviour that means she shouldn't marry you.

Eh? That's the most bonkers thing I ever heard! And it's she, not he 😂

She said yes because she didn't feel she could say no.

So break off the engagement.

She doesn't want to break up, but what she wants isn't what you want so - it's over to you really...

^^ this

thats a pretty fundamental difference of opinion, however unless you are looking to start a family and want some kind of legal protection- marriage is pretty pointless and expensive to undo 🤷🏼‍♂️

I am sorry @MichBarr , but making sure she is in an environment where she couldn't feel like saying no to you is a pretty immature way of going about it. Was this a good solution, you think? Shouldn't this be something she wanted to do on her own instead of being pressured to do so? Or you are happy either way, as long as you get results? It is not great, think about it. It should be an intimate thing between two people who love each other, and instead, you turned it into a public spectacle just to make sure she is not comfortable enough to turn you down. Equally, she should not be influenced by the environment, doesn't matter if you are around friends, family or a crowd of people you don't know. A balanced, mature person would not just give in to immature pressure like that. And like I said, a mature grownup would not force it on her with circumstances, either. All of it is just a a big dysfunctional setup...
The way you said: "I don't know what to do if she doesn't feel the same" - There you go. That's the key. If someone doesn't feel that way, you can't just force your will on the situation. You either accept it, or you move on and find someone you are more compatible with. But in all honesty, if these are the challenges you have, you shouldn't get married either.

You should never propose in a public place or in front of other people!
If she doesn’t want to get married I don’t see what you can do about it really, either you stay and don’t get married or you leave and marry someone else

If you want to to be married and she doesnt, then you either stay unmarried or you find someone else to marry you

A public proposal would be a no from me as first poster says. It's manipulative.

Marry good than be alone

Do you want kids, it's a good idea to get married if you have kids for the legal protection.

I asked her in a public place and she didn't feel she could say no

Dick move.

If someone did this to me, if I'd wanted to marry them in the first place it would put me off. If I didn't want to marry them to start with, it would cement that feeling.