Wills for lone parents

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Reposted for lone parents as it’s a bit of a ghost town on there

This is a bit sensitive so trigger warning …..
I know we can say who we want our children to go to in a will but can we also say who we dont want our children to go to? I’m asking because I had a family member die very young recently leaving behind two small children and now I keep having nightmares and worrying what will happen to my children if something happens to me. I have an abusive family member who I do not want them to go to but would almost certainly try to gain residency of them. Can I do a will stating I don’t want them to go to this family member? (They will not go to their father) i dont have anyone for them to go to so im not asking if I can list someone for them to go with just if I can state who I absolutely dont want to have them

I think all you can do is try to influence the outcome by laying out in written detail why you consider an individual to be unsuitable, regardless of who it embarrasses.

You can use a letter of wishes, kept alongside your will, to set this sort of thing out. Include as much detail as possible about why it’s your wish for this relative not to be considered for guardianship. If you name no preferred guardian then their court-appointed guardian, working with social services, will take a decision about how they should be cared for based on the information you’ve provided and their own assessments.