How do you handle conflict and boundaries with in laws?

[orangelambpeanutbutter]

Last year we moved to live closer to my in laws after living for the last decade near my parents.

My husband and I have brought up issues with them about things they’ve done to upset us, but they get really angry with us when we do.

When they are upset with something we’ve done they withdraw and go quiet with communication and don’t initiate getting together, etc.

Im trying to figure out how to live near them with these patterns that are emerging.

Do you address issues with your in laws, or do you let everything go? Or somehow find a balance in the middle? If you do address issues with in-laws, how do you do it and how does it go?

You say you bring up disagreement with them, what is the actual disagreement?
It is really pertinent to the question tbh.

What sort of things are they doing to upset you?

Well boundaries would be things like
We will go and see them every other Sunday for 2 hours
Or we will not leave them in sole charge of the kids
Or we will never discuss politics with them
Or we will only communicate via text message
What kind of scenario?

Are you the poster who has just moved over from America and withdrew their other thread?