Met a man aged 18 when I worked in a sports club (he was 3 years older than me and played for one of the teams) we were casual acquaintances for years, he went off his way (got married, had a child, divorced) and I went mine (none of the above). But we knew each other to say hello to still. With the advent of social media we added each other and then about four years ago when he split with his ex we started messaging.... cue a long period of time where we were friends with benefits (the sex was pretty amazing but I never saw him as anything else)
He'd always wanted to turn it into something more, so towards the end of last year I finally thought what did we have to lose. Turns out a lot. We were absolutely not compatible in a relationship at all, which led to arguments and both of us saying things we didn't mean, and then him blocking me. I know it's stupid but I still miss him, even without the sex, I've lost a friend of a long time
I don't know if he's in a relationship now (he has form for getting serious very quickly) as I can't see his social media and we don't have other friends in common. I've started work in a pub recently and I just keep hoping one day he'll come in. It's a small town so who knows but to be fair he doesn't drink. I'd just like to be friends again but unfortunately I still fancy him so much (that could be the testosterone HRT talking I guess but I haven't had chance to test it out!)
I'm an idiot aren't I and I need to grow up and stop pining!