Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Ending it with FWB - is text ok?

10 replies

Ilovelurchers · 06/04/2026 13:09

I started a FWB relationship about 9 months ago - we met around once a month, texted daily, not just about sex, there was a sense of genuine friendship there (I thought).

Though I was ok with FWB at the time (I wanted a bit of a break from commitment) I guess maybe I hoped it might develop into more eventually, but it became clear that it wouldn't ever be more, and when my father died at the start of this year he made no real effort to support me (fair enough, he wasn't obliged to - but that definitely showed me where his head was at regarding me).

Meanwhile my ex came back into my life while I was dealing with my father's end of life care, and was incredibly supportive to an extent I would never have expected of him - I really saw a different side of him, enough to try again (though we are taking it very slowly).

I had stopped texting FWB about anything much other than trivialities, so assumed he would get the message - but he now appears to think my dad's death is long enough in the past, that he can suggest meeting up for sex again.....

Do I need to phone him and tell him that's not happening, or is saying it over text enough? I have to say I would find text a lot easier myself - just less embarrassing, and I can think through what to say in advance, etc.

(Just for clarity, ex and FWB are two different people - hope it makes sense!)

OP posts:
teaandtoastwouldbenice · 06/04/2026 13:12

Just text

SuperSugarHigh · 06/04/2026 13:17

Text is fine - he didn’t have the decency to step up (or by the sounds of it even offer the basic support a friend would) so you don’t owe him anything more than a text.

category12 · 06/04/2026 13:17

Text is fine.

You don't have to explain it particularly either.

EdinaMonsoonsWardrobe · 06/04/2026 14:59

"Hi Simon can't meet up anymore as I'm now in a relationship. All the best".

Job done. He won't care

DatingWoe · 06/04/2026 15:05

Text is fine, why wouldnt it be? Doesn’t sound like you ever spoke on the phone anyway

TamarindCottage · 06/04/2026 15:11

Text and block. Good luck

Sewaccidentprone · 06/04/2026 15:11

I once had a similar relationship (in the days before mobile phones). I wasn't very assertive and just didn’t know how to tell him to stop coming round every few weeks.

i was in a shared house, so I just moved to a new place

DatingWoe · 06/04/2026 15:12

DatingWoe · 06/04/2026 15:05

Text is fine, why wouldnt it be? Doesn’t sound like you ever spoke on the phone anyway

As in it would be odd to call him to “end things”’when it didn’t sound like you spoke much (at all?) on the phone anyway, just when he next asks to see you say you are no longer interested in meeting up anymore.

DaffodilTuesday · 06/04/2026 15:12

Given what you have described here, I would agree with the other posters that text is fine. I don’t think you even need to give a reason beyond this is not working for you anymore.
It sounds like you have had a lot to deal with so take care of yourself.

Ilovelurchers · 06/04/2026 17:39

Thanks so much all - just done it!

I worry too much about these things - I can't imagine he will be particularly bothered! Anyway, glad I have done it and it's off my mind now.

Thank you to all who replied - you are very kind.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread