Friend’s dad died last year.
Her mum is maginally ok to live at home by herself, with help. Help is provided by friend and sibling.
Friend lives 2 hrs drive away - spends all weekend and Wednesdays with her + nights on either side. Often goes direct to work from there.
Sibling lives locally to mum and makes minimum effort - comes in for 10 mins 3-4 days a weeks to give mum her meds.
Friend is single & childless. Sibling is married with teen/adult children.
In theory Friend & Sibling both have enduring power of attorney. In practice sibling has all the passwords, cards etc to mum’s bank account & NHS app etc. Friend needed to buy Mum some new underwear and shoes recently. Sibling refused to give her any money from mum’s account as “that’s not what it’s for”.
Sibling has booked to go away all bank holidays for the next year.and all of August, telling friend she’ll have to go another times - bagssying all the BH without discussing with Friend seems very unfair.
Friend is fed up & exhausted, and spending a fortune on fuel. Sibling won’t discuss carers/care home even though Friend believes funds are available. Sibling seems to be doing bare minimum. Sibling thinks Friend should give up work, sell her house to look after Mum because she is single (what?? and her life is worth less?). Friend has no intention of doing so!
It feels like emotional and financial domestic abuse from her sibling. Is this a thing? Can she do anything?