Not finding boyfriend physically attractive after 10 months, should I end it?

[Tiktinny]

Mid 40’s Going out with my boyfriend for 10 months. We get on really well , have good sex life and I don’t find him very physically attractive any more. We were friends 1 year before we got together and I fancied him for first couple of months. Spark seems to be gone. Do I need to end this?

Have you had many long term relationships OP?

It’s fine Op.
It won’t be the tan itself ( or the aging) it’s more what it represents to you.
You are getting to know him and you don’t fancy him. Just tell him. I bet he’ll still happily have fun sex for a few months yet .

Peri-menopause?

Maybe you just like the dating stage

Personally I think strong attraction is really important if you want to stay with someone a long time.

However, just because you say you find him handsome but spark gone, just checking you haven't started anti depressants or contractive pill? Both can totally screw libido.

Let him find someone who does.

Can't you hold on til the summer when he might get his suntan back? Maybe in future agree to barely see each other in winter?

Wow if a tan was keeping it going the attraction can’t have been strong.

🤣

Are you in perimenopause? This may be the first sign.

Agreed.

😂🤣

Agree. Could be your libido has taken a sudden dive due to falling estrogen. Unless you're still fancying other men?

Honeymoon period and initial
Spark will always wane.

Seems like we have the winner. If after ten months he hasn't been arrested, smashed up a pub after eight pints of Stella, perhaps driven his car into the front of Boots or, at the very least, tried to shag Sandra at the Dog and Duck after watching Liverpool lose, then there's no hope for him.

Get yourself down to the Wethespoons nearest the courts on a Friday at about 6pn and look for the bloke in a suit. Chances are hes been let off going to prison and is in full "one day he will change" mode. He'll be able to tell how hes been stitched up and its not his fault.

Winner.

How would you would feel if you break up and next month say, you see him looking loved up with someone new?

Sorry. If there was an emotional connection there you wouldnt be treating him like this.

There clearly isnt one. If your questioning his attractiveness and ending it after 10 months based on a tan?!

If there is nothing else you can put your finger on and it is just superficial stuff then you dont understand what an emotional connection is.

My DP was tanned when I first was talking to him, he'd had 2 weeks in a hot country. Clearly this tan faded during our time. I still fancy the pants off him. We have such a strong bond and emotional connection I couldn't imagine noticing anything so superficial. I love him for the person he is, and I can 100% be myself too, even in my lowest hormonal point and he 100% loves me too.

Its all well and good to change your mind about anyone at any point. But don't dress it up by saying you have an emotional connection when its such a superficial reason.