Feeling floored after break up

[TimeTraveller2718]

i have posted on here a few times, more recently about the ending of my 6 year relationship. I met this man when I was just 19 and we got serious about 6 years ago. He was my first and only ever boyfriend. We had a house together and I recently discovered he has cheated on me (this is not the first time) I know of 2 occasions but I suspect there is more. I found out as he got a STD (horrific I know) and he was forced to tell me. We are now separated and he is not trying to reconcile.

My mental health is on the floor, I have started therapy but I keep getting these pangs of pain when I imagine him moving on. We were each others first and only partners and the thought of him moving on absolutely guts me. I have found out he is already on dating apps and this hurt me even more than when I first discovered the cheating. I don’t know why I’m so scared to imagine him with someone else but it’s all I can think of. Of course I don’t want him back but I miss him terribly and the life we had together.

I have never had another partner and I am so frightened for the future, I know this sounds pathetic.

Not pathetic at all. I'm sorry it went that way.
Get yourself checked by your GP/sexual health clinic. Protect yourself financially. Do not try and be the bigger person. Don't protect his ego or reputation. Don't be ashamed for what he did to you. Don't seek revenge. Just look after yourself in all respects. You will heal in time. 💛💐

I know it hurts now but time is the only thing that will help. The pain will ease with time. And you will realise more day by day that this man did not love or respect you. You are worth more and deserve so much better.

Give yourself time. And actively distract yourself from thinking about him at all - when your mind drifts to him, tell yourself firmly STOP and go and do something to distract yourself - scrubbing the bath, clean out the fridge, go for a brisk walk, punch some pillows, sort out your old clothes, ring a friend for a chat - anything except allowing yourself to think about him.

If you find you're thinking about missing him, remind yourself that he was off shagging someone behind your back, he's lied to you many many times and treated you appallingly. Get a dart board and put a picture if his face on it. Or a voodoo doll!

You are far from pathetic. You are doing great despite what you have been through.

Take one day at a time. Be kind to yourself.