Why do they do it?

[ChocolateSqueezyyogurts]

Why do men give the silent treatment even though they know you struggle with it.
I dont know why but it breaks me

Bingo!

This exactly. I learned this too late with my ex.

Becuase they're too immature to handle their own emotions and they know you'll give in eventually.
It's a recognised abuse tactic.

Do you have children?
If you do then they will be affected by this too.
If you don’t then get out quick (if you don’t get out make sure you have very effective contraception, this treatment will magnify x 100 once you have children).

He is abusing you. This is one of the first tactics some individuals use to control the narrative, and are fully aware of what they are doing.

Whatever you attempt to do, such as ask him why, change who you are so that you can avoid this from him, will never work, ever. This is not you.

What you can do is either remove yourself from this relationship, or get smaller so he is comfortable.

Have you tried doing it back to him? I know it's not a long term solution or healthy but it's better than pandering to him and begging him to speak to you. My emotionally abusive husband tried the silent treatment on me, but after about an hour of it I twigged what was going on and just did it back to him. I totally ignored him, turned my back and left if he walked into the same room I was in etc. and all of a sudden he started talking to me again 🙄 It turned out I was better at the silent treatment than he was and so he only tried it the once. (I am planning on leaving when I have my ducks in a row.)