Hand hold please , drowning in sadness

[ByPinkPoet]

Feeling overwhelmingly sad and hopeless today. I have been posting this week, I won’t drag it up again, but I’m coming to the realisation I may not have married the man I thought I did. The thought of breaking the family apart is dreadful. We’ve been together a long time since i was young and have a large young family. I am so sad

please be kind if you reply

just looking for a hand hold please
or tell me something happy

I'm so sorry to read, I was there twenty years ago and I was heartbroken. Now I look back and it was better that we split and I'm better off without him. I wouldn't of believed that then. I was pregnant and had a baby. He was my first proper partner. I thought he was my world.

You can be happy without him. You can move forwards. It's scary but deserve love, happiness, feeling valued and cared for. Wishing you a brighter future.

I’ve been there too and whilst it does hurt and you just have to ride it out, for me it was a pinnacle on which my life really began.

im very much happier now, I understand myself as a person more and I value myself.

it is going to be ok, not today or tomorrow but it’s not always going to feel like this x

I’ll also tell you something happy …. When we split my life fell apart literally - I became ill, nearly lost my home, was reliant on benefits and was literally in the gutter.

2 of my 3 children went on to gain good degrees - I kept my home and am still in it, I met a fabulous man who pursued me and we are v happy years later - I have my absolute dream job and….. from having virtually no family (I have no parents and 2 dodgy siblings) I now have a huuuuuge family with my partner as he came from a big family and they’ve all welcomed me in !!

My ex? Is still looking at life through the bottom of a bottle and no longer causes me any trouble !!

Thank you . Glad to hear you found happiness x
I am just imagining my life alone and it seems actually impossible in every way. Practically, logistically , financially , emotionally - everything!

That is happy and I’m very happy for you :)
thank you! and well done to your children! I’m a long way off that at the moment !

It’s not impossible !!! It will be harder and different for a while then it will become your new norm and you’ll learn to live it and feel the benefits of freedom and peace and find your power and your passions and you’ll heal and you’ll become the person you should always have been !! You’re literally a seed waiting to sprout and blossom - there’s so much joy out there that you haven’t recognised.

You’re on the cusp of making your own happiness - honestly once you accept it and embrace it, it becomes really liberating - you really can do this !!!

Very motivating:)
thank you for replying it made me smile

OP, you are walking in the right direction. Please keep going. Surround yourself with friends and family who love you and will support you.

Get out whilst you can, I’m 70 & still stuck with mine …he’s starting to show signs of dementia, lucky me?

It’s not impossible & it won’t be as bad as you think! Financially, it is more difficult but the household is happier. There were some days I didn’t want him to come home (he was a HGV driver so away Monday morning - Friday lunchtime).

The children will always come first but they are also living a much better life because there isn’t the disharmony.

Write down how you're feeling now and then do so every few months, then you'll be able to see how far you've come when you look back!

My friend broke up with her long term partner a couple of years ago, used to call in floods of tears, and now is super happy! Sadly, it takes time but time is the greatest healer.

Think of it like cutting out a tumour. The process of getting rid of it might be painful, but with time you'll feel a million times better and you won't be dragged down anymore. You've got this ❤️

First of all, everything you are feeling is normal. You would be mad to feel any other way.
I have read your other thread and will leave the advice you have got over there.
You are such a hard working person. You have worked hard all of your life, and your children are your primary force. Your care for them, and protection of them, is wonderful.
You have many, many years to go in this world and one day, when you look back, you will remember this as being an awful one.
The only thing I have learned as I’ve gotten older is that time is really the only healer.
When you are in such pain you want it to stop, and so you ignore what’s best for you to stop the pain in the moment.
We have all done it.
You have good friends and a good support system.
I have a feeling, having read your other post, that you are made of tougher stuff than you think. You deserve to be loved the way you love.
I have been heartened by reading the many threads on here which start off with a heartbroken woman and end with an empowered one. It can take time - a few years sometimes - but when a poster returns with good news, it’s brilliant to read.
Personally, I went through a huge period of turmoil which I thought would kill me. Then I lost both of my parents, quite quickly, and I have no DC. But time changed that.
Yes, I did meet someone but that’s not the story. I had to really dig deep and now I am content. Not swinging from the chandeliers, but happy leading a simple life.
You will get there, it might not seem like that today.
Keep talking to your friends, and to us.

My apologies @ByPinkPoet that was meant for a different poster.
You are very brave.

Some of these messages are so lovely thank you xx it’s lovely to hear when people’s lives turned out amazing after they made their decision.

you are all very strong and brave x