Feeling dreadful, I need to write something

[Touty]

I lived abroad for over 10 years with a partner, for various reasons I couldn’t hack it anymore.

I moved back to UK and bought a house on my own. He will not move with me.

I feel so lonely and bereft. I feel like I’m all alone in the world, nothing to look forward to and just waiting to die.

I feel like a stupid woman, I made great personal sacrifices to live abroad etc. He has not put himself out one bit and seems to have everything in his terms.

I feel depressed and bitter.

@Toutynot good either tbh, im really down. I get my house back next week so should be positive but I just feel sad. I hoped my dp would come back but he doesnt want to and just moans about money when I speak to him. We're on different pages.

@Touty you are clearly depressed and say you're on antidepressants.

Have you been to see your GP? If not, please make an appointment first thing on Monday morning. I'm assumed you are registered with a GP since your return? That is the very first thing. You will feel hopeless and miserable until you sort your depression out.

Sounds like you dodged a bullet. You have the world at your feet op, it may not feel like it right now but it will get better.

Also, a word of warning you are the perfect target for the recently divorced hobosexuals. Homeless men desperately looking for a warm bed and live in carer. Be very wary of any new partners declaring their undying love in the first few weeks.

I feel like I can’t cope with the loneliness and the uncertainty
should I get a lodger

I was just about to ask if you’d thought about a lodger - could be a good plan

I know everyone’s different but I had never lived alone until I was in my 50’s and I hated it. I felt lonely Bd empty.

Now a few years down the line I’m absolutely thriving m, love the peace and my own space and can not imagine living with another human again let alone a man!

Take time OP and it will get better.

If you are just on your own every day it is making things worse. Go out of your new home, say hello to as many people as you are able. Are you in employment? Do you need to work?

Even if you are working go to at least one activity a week. Doesn't need to be permanent, just give as many a go as you can over the next couple of months until you find what floats your boat:

Choir, volunteering at a local community venue, exercise class, local amateur dramatic society, dog or cat walking/fostering, volunteer at local animal rescue, music playing group. One of my friends goes to Irish Set Dancing (not Riverdance), line dancing. Some towns/villages have a Sunday lunch club.

There are lots of other things around if you don't live too rural and are physically active. Best of luck and remember everyone has been a stranger in social gatherings at some time.

You’ve got to go out to the world because the world won’t come to you.

Get yourself out through the door and join something.

Invite people you meet and think you’d like to know better around for coffee.
Talk to your neighbours when you see them.
Be more sociable and open to offers, anything that you might be interested in.
Go back to church. Maybe not every Sunday but you might see people you can stop & chat to locally afterwards when you’re out.

Volunteer somewhere local. Doesn’t have to be forever.

Many of us have devoted our lives to unappreciative men. When the chips are down and we’re facing life alone it’s natural to feel used and discarded. Tomorrow is the first day for your resolve to change things. Get yourself outdoors gal!