May I just have a little moment of sorrow and a vent on just hos sad and scared I am that I’ll be Forever Alone?

[HideYourFace]

I hate being alone and single. And yes, I’m even envies of couples (can we hold the people in relationships are so sad and miserable thing for now) I find it so hard to to listen to/about couples be it good or bad or neutral, I am or will soon be past being able to have kids and it makes me so sad. And scared. I don’t like who I’m becoming - the loneliness, feeling a failure and like I don’t belong here, everyone mostly just talk about their partners/kids…moving on in life (awesome for them, not saying they shouldn’t , just in case someone thinks that’s what I’m saying) and everytime I just feel worse. I fear I’ll become bitter, I already care less and less about things/others and want to isolate more and more. It’s so endless…

If you are in your 30s or 40s that's a hard time to be single if you don't want to be, as many of your friends are likely to be very preoccupied with relationships/ families and thus rather poor company, so I do get it.

If you are still single and not a parent in your 50s onwards you will probably find it is a lot easier to have fun with contemporaries - their kids will be older, their marriages will be less exciting at best, or even dull/over, kids will be less hands-on-all-the-time or indeed gone.

So you won't be so alone - and you will quite possibly have more time, money and energy than they do,as well.

I actually married and started a family at 40 (it wasn't particularly an ambition of mine) but I do still wonder about the road not taken and wonder what I might have done instead, with the energy that went into my family.

But yes ,of course you can have a moment of sorrow. Just don't let it define your outlook.

I'm so sorry that you want a child and feel that time is running out. I am so grateful for my DS and I can imagine it hurts. How long do you think you have left to conceive ?

I've been single for 8 years. I needed that time out after suffering so much in an abusive relationship, but lately I've been wishing I had someone. Someone to go to the movies with, dinner, just to spend time with. Someone to love. The rush of falling in love. I see my niece and my partner together, and how happy they are, and I want that. I miss it.

I've been thinking a lot about a guy I knew years ago, for months and months, to the point that sometimes I think I'm on love with him. Maybe it's stopping, as I haven't really thought about him much in about two months. But perhaps I am just projecting my loneliness on him.

I do get approached by men now and then. But my psych meds have made me gain lots of weight and I don't feel comfortable in my own skin to date yet. I want to try to turn things around this year and once I've done that I hope to meet someone.

Why do you think you are remaining single ? Is it a confidence issue ? Have you tried online dating ? My brother met my sister in law that way. Do you have friends or sisters that would go out to the pub with you so that you might meet a man there ?

I'm so sorry that you want a child and feel that time is running out. I am so grateful for my DS and I can imagine it hurts. How long do you think you have left to conceive ?

thank you, I’m just about to turn 40, so not much time I’d assume or it’s already over.