So long story short, I’ve been with my husband for 15 years, married for 11.
We have two children and on several occasions my husband has broken my trust by watching/paying live cam girls.
The first time it happened I told him it was something I was uncomfortable with in our relationship. The second time it happened, I reminded him that I thought it was unacceptable.
The third time it happened I was 7 months pregnant with a toddler and found out he had been trying to cover it up for months.
He knew the consequences so lied about it all and when it all came out I asked him to leave.
After a few days struggling on my own I felt like I had no choice to take him back.
This was 5 years ago now and despite having marriage and solo therapy, I can’t seem to move on from what happened.
There’s been a wall between us ever since, I’m resentful and repulsed by what he did.
My mental health has took a nose dive this past year and I think it’s because deep down I feel like I’m wasting my life stuck waiting for my feelings to change.
He really is a good dad, he swears he hasn’t been on those websites since and never be stupid enough to do it again but I don’t believe him. He says he’s willing to do anything to regain my trust but I don’t know how that can happen.
Is there any hope?