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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

I didn’t take/hide/steal DP passport !

30 replies

passportstealer · 11/02/2026 21:23

DP has a female best friend he’s known her since university. It’s no secret we don’t get on. She was his friend and happy with that till he met me and then decided she might have feelings for him etc etc. we were in our 20s then and I was more tolerant when really I should have put her in her place.

They have continued a friendship. Do an activity together and she planned a trip as a belated 40th for him. I wasn’t happy I admit that. Two other friends going too (male).

DP is totally disorganised and I am guilty of not helping in these situations as I felt why should I as wasn’t happy about it. Well of course he lost his passport and on the day had to cancel as realised last minute. She has blamed me and accused me of sabotaging the trip! I’d never do such a thing and even DP has had to say to her to stop being so nasty to me about it .

I can’t lie I’m secretly hoping their falling out is permanent. He still hasn’t found his passport !

OP posts:

tuvamoodyson · 12/02/2026 16:58

Changename12 · 11/02/2026 22:17

i am another one who thinks that you shouldn’t put up with this situation. Why weren’t you invited on this trip?

They don’t get on.

Howwilliknow122 · 12/02/2026 17:04

Brefugee · 11/02/2026 21:26

Tell him that this is it and you are not going to put up with him having her in his life if she is going to be so nasty about you.

Tell him you have put up with it, and that you have been more forebaring than most other women.

If she addresses you directly? "Fuck off "should suffice

Exactly this and p.s I dont care if you did hide the passport. 🤣

AgentJohnson · 12/02/2026 17:09

You need to add wet blanket to his list of flaws.

LucyLoo1972 · 12/02/2026 23:41

my husband lost his wallet and found it months later in a zipped up suit carrier on the back of the door. how it got there I have no clue

Sassylovesbooks · 15/02/2026 19:42

You may not necessarily believe this woman fancies your husband, but what is very clear, is that she's jealous of you. For her to be jealous of you, to this extent, I do think she fancies him. I'm assuming that your husband has never shown any romantic interest in her when they were younger? She possibly decided that friendship with your husband is better than nothing. She coped with this whilst he was single but when he started dating you, it re-enforced that he'd never be hers.

Your husband has now seen the nasty side of his friend, and perhaps the blinkers are beginning to come off!! You know what this woman can be like, because you've seen how nasty she can be. Instead of interfering in the friendship, in a way you played the long game (even though you may not realise it), because you've let your husband find out for himself, what this woman is like!!

Your husband has stuck up for you, which is exactly what he should have done. I can understand why you are secretly pleased he's lost his passport!!

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