How to get over someone when you have a baby with them??

[Bambamxx]

Me and my now ex partner split up last week after 2 years together and a gorgeous 9 month old baby boy. Our relationship went to sh*t it in honest after I had DS and battling PND. (Other stuff too like I found him on dating apps! During my pregnancy but stayed out of fear of being alone)
I called it off finally last week (v messy break up) and although he’s still seeing DS, and says he will always be here for me I am STRUGGLING. My god I haven’t stopped crying in days, I feel like I am literally grieving. I even begged for him back yesterday which is utterly pathetic…
I feel like he’s well over me already by talking about going to the pub etc
while I’m at home honestly heartbroken! Speaking to my friend yesterday she did say the relationship was dead in the water already once I found him on the apps… but why does this hurt so so much 😪

I’m sorry OP, it sounds like a really tough situation. I have a friend who became single while pregnant and she has always said it’s the hardest break up she’s ever had because she can’t just block him, ignore him, not see him again because they have to speak for their son. I know she found it helpful in the early days to hand some of that off though, she had some of us & her family take turns dropping their child off with dad/picking child up from dad to limit their contact until she felt ready to start that herself which I think did really help her, and she set firm boundaries in all other communication being strictly about their child rather than each other, feelings, the relationship or break up which helped.

Thank you 😭 I think I’m just holding on for something that isn’t there?

You’re missing the person you wanted him to be but that is not the person he is. Going on dating apps while you were pregnant is reason enough to walk away.

Give yourself time and space, have someone else do hand overs if you can and keep text/calls etc strictly to your child, vent to your family/friends/therapist about it all but do not vent to him. You cannot be healed by the same person who broke you, remember that.

In a years time you will feel so different honestly, hang in there x