Cocaine in marriage

[Nevergonnachange]

Found out not long after our wedding that husband does cocaine. Had suspected it over the years, even accused him at times, but he strongly denied it.

I found out by snooping through his phone (I am not proud of that). I just don’t know where we go from here. If he has lied about this, what else could he have lied about?

So he repeatedly lied to you when specifically asked! That is not someone you can or should trust.

Time to double up on contraception and consider how you want your future life to be.

Is he addicted do you think? His refusal to even consider discussing it suggests he is. I'm sorry, that's awful.

It’s not the coke that would end for me out of those two issues, it would be the lying.

What are you planning to do?

Addicts lie, it's what they do. Obviously if he'd admitted to being a coke head before you married, he knew you wouldn't have married him. Brace yourself, because most addicts with expensive habits also have a load of debt to show (well, hide) for it too.

They do often have huge debt. I’d recommend looking up a copy of your own credit report as they often take out debt in your name as well as their own.

It's a pity you've found out after getting tethered to him. Addicts are such liabilities. What will you do now?

How are you today @Nevergonnachange?

My BIL does coke and lies to his wife about it. He isn’t an addict but he doesn’t really go out for a drink without doing it. Thankfully he doesn’t seem to go out very often.

He does lie to his wife about other things. I think it’s just for an easy life but it doesn’t make much sense to me. He’d rather lie than have the ear ache.