don’t know if anyone can help or relate. I asked my husband in advance if I could go away for the weekend with a friend, so it wouldn’t be last minute. He said “bear with me” while we were talking about other things. When I asked again later, he shouted at me in front of his parents, saying I don’t understand.
Today I messaged him asking if I could borrow his car — he didn’t reply. When he came home early, I mentioned that I’d messaged and hadn’t heard back. He then lectured me (calmly) saying I was disrespectful for bringing it up. He said he’s under stress because two of his aunts passed away last week and he’s working full-time, and that his anger is coming out on me.
Apparently, I’ve also been told I disrespected his mother. She was frustrated about something while holding my baby and said, “someone take this baby,” in an irritated way. I replied, “please don’t put frustration onto the baby,” and that was taken badly, with faces made afterward.
I’m his wife — am I wrong here? Am I not allowed to ask simple questions? He says I “argue back” when I don’t; I’m just responding to things I feel are unfair or incorrect. I’m exhausted from having to beg or ask for basic things and then being made out to be rude or at fault every time. Is this really what a relationship is meant to feel like?